say you like it the way it is.

2010-05-03T01:42:00.002+08:00

OH, SNAP

(MOVED)

that's 5 years of blogger, changing times indeed

it's nice knowing there's a diary for you somewhere out there,

to rethread memories, undeleted :)

#290 lifeswirls in colour

2010-02-27T00:04:00.001+08:00

so the thing is, this whole teaching gig is really growing on me quite strong. if ever medicine doesn't work out, i would not hesitate to take up a teaching post somewhere. i've wondered if perhaps a teaching environment in your alma mater makes the job somewhat more sheltered - in that your colleagues and students recognize you and are able to bond/interact on a more personal level. but so far, the job's been mother stressful (marking/admin) and i DO complain about it... BUT (there's always a bigger one), it's incredibly fulfilling. and i can't think of a more constructive or better way to pass my pre-uni time right now

and the best part is alena agrees with me on this, it appears :) go us! haha.

#289 ingonyama

2010-02-17T02:22:00.004+08:00

take a shower w mascara still on: INSTANT HALLOWEEN MAKEUP (:

ahahaha okay random. anyway, dont really know what to blog abt these days, i'd rather just keep the memories... (and oh im starting a diary HAH) but yea. watched vee-day (the movie) w mom today (yes i watched the most romantic movie of the year w my mom) - and realized how absolutely star-studded the cast was. mmm yummy :)

and then of course i thought of how rachel told us tt she didnt realize she was next to the building where the london premiere of veeday was being held (!!) so she completely missed out on like, bradley cooper, patrick dempsey, eric dane, emma/julia roberts, jessica biel/alba, ashton kutcher (i've begun to think he's actually quite goodlooking). and she was completely miffed of course (and so were we). its like me having a liverpool ticket and not taking it up HAHAH

oh well even if hugh dancy stays in manhattan and i had a week's worth of chances to spot him around town since he's not doing any filming now (okay yeah right wake up, what chance -.-), it's damn well a great feeling to be back. home :)

/edit:
all that time i was in west village and dancy was right there at the same time in the lucille theatre. OMG ):

#288 chitchatterie

2010-01-18T21:46:00.005+08:00

Oh boy. I was telling mumsy abt UHGD from the hospital today and she told me to behave -.- Because... "your most expressive features are your eyes. You can't keep a poker face because your eyes react faster than your mouth, and when they say windows to your soul, your eyes are more like the windows to EVERYTHING in you." HAHA now that really makes me wanna stand in front of a mirror and practise all kinds of emotions and see what my eyes 'say' and yes that is so freaking narcissistic and a waste of time so okay no im not going to do it - kapoof thats one whole sentence that makes me sound like a retard :D but it's not the first time I've heard it.

ANYWAY UHGD OMG. It's like double of 50% of my neighbours. NEYHEH only those who know who lives in 33 know what I'm talking about :P and that would only be my other neighbour. SEKRITZ. Okay shutup jayce :D

BZZZT. It's really sad that two friends are moving away to aussie in the coming month. And one dropped the bomb after telling me for ages that she was still involved in school things (which was true btw), but not as a student *cough JO cough* It's abit hard to get round the fact that the only person I've known for 99% of my life is moving away. Who abandons who in the end?!?! PFFBT but hey if we all wind up in aussie... that won't be too bad either. AHAHA UTAS we can go hunting for like TASMANIAN DEVILS after school everyday. Okay but that's if local doesn't work out (RAWR) Idk man. Hoho the chances of us being mauled alive by said Devil are bigger than us perishing from sniffing formaldehyde in the mortuaries or something everyday.

Hmm this mind of mine wanders back to sat night when we stopped to see if we could help the couple from the motorcycle accident. It was probably one of the most major things I'd seen the entire week fit for A & E. Its like I was staring at the white strip beyond all that rumpled skin and flesh and with that sickening clinch realized what we were looking at was bone :/

Load of things twirling around on my fingertips and all but the BTT book (and test tmw) calls so goodbye x

#287 take a run, build a bridge

2010-01-05T02:13:00.003+08:00

Pastor malcolm tan: "i cannot promise you that 2010 will be a year without troubles, but i can promise you one thing. 2010 is two-oh-one-oh AD, Anno Domini. The year of our Lord. And because of that, i can promise each and everyone of you that Jesus is with you throughout the year, because the year belongs to Jesus, and He will see you through."

ohmygad. tomorrow. the fear of it cancels out everything else i've been feeling or thinking, knowing at this time tomorrow, some of us may be just simply sitting in bed staring at a wall. or wringing our hands waiting for the minute hands to tick by. or sitting in the kitchen bingeing on banana and chocolate cake and roti prata (sans the curry, that'll be me :P)

any plans i might've made for the next few days have ground to a momentarily standstill. the spacey bubble of thoughts that has formed explosively over the past few days now hangs as an immobile orb - nothing's really happening or moving too satisfactorily until 6 jan noon is over. well, its great comfort that tomorrow evening finds many of us back in school, on the rooftop amidst the cool breezes only to be found at that kind of height. a reprieve from everything, to just... Be still and know :)

cliched, but because beyond all this irrational fear, there is also something else called Hope. not just for tomorrow, but for many many other things. tomorrow i'll face up to what i've been avoiding consciously for a long long long while; just surrender it all

#286 twelve daze

2010-01-03T23:36:00.002+08:00

psychologically unleashed/physically uncontrolled is what i would probably call it at the end of the day. the memories are there, and here to stay. in the aftermath of occasions like these, being lost in the dreamy glittery world of sleep and sweet dreams becomes so much more appealing than being actually awake (and the truth is, i seldom or never get nightmares). the moment when you wake up is the part i dislike the most, when everything in your dream begins to slip away and you start, realizing where you are, what time it is, what you have to deal with. at first (which isnt long ago, truth be told), i fully intended to just let time and tide take things along to wherever - simply because thats the easier way out than worrying, waiting and wondering. of course, this was also a first reaction to the disconcerting revelations and recounts. and while trying to get over and accept the haunting memories, there also are the immense waves of gratitude. to Him for helping me make decisions that would have perhaps yielded very different consequences if chosen differently. to them all for their incredible sense of responsibility that played a huge part in having us all home safely. and in those first moments etched with intense fear, panic and confusion, there followed almost immediately the internal relief and realization of the presence of a friend whom i knew i could trust fully, and to the very end - for the second time, i owe a hell lot. and finally, to samtheman who listened, admonished, sat by for the comforts of hainanese chicken rice and some good girl laughs, helped me make an important call, who was there in the aftermath.

so for now, the next couple days or so will have to include some form of reflection, to begin to move past the initial embarrassment, to make reconciliations with... well, not people, but so many things in my head. to ease my way through the complications of consequences, and hopefully come out somewhere realizing that just perhaps im thinking too much. after all, the past 60 hours have had every single well-oiled cog in my head wheeling, and churning

but the question at the end of the day (and which i think is applicable to us all) is: do you want the year to happen to you/do you want to be the crab in the waves on shore that lets the tide take it wherever it runs? or do you want to make something (good/splendid/mindblowingly explosively wonderful) happen in this year instead? ... um, the barnacle that clings tightly onto the rock and doesn't let go until it decides to move elsewhere?

anyway, shove it all, and say hi to two thousand ten (:

Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths

Enwrought with golden and silver light,

The blue and the dim and the dark cloths

Of night and light and the half light,

I would spread the cloths under your feet:

But I, being poor, have only my dreams;

I have spread my dreams under your feet;

Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

- WB Yeats

2010-01-03T21:02:00.001+08:00

About 2500 students around Australia will receive their results for the baccalaureate early on Monday after they are released in Cardiff, Wales, to more than 3000 schools around the world.

- Sydney Morning Herald

GG.

#285

2009-12-16T09:47:00.006+08:00

there is a pile of very tempting gifts staying fully wrapped sitting on my bedroom floor. will resist the urge until sat, hohoho. Christmas gift exchange next week? maybe. Father Christmas, all I want is... :)

anyway, this japanese 3-year-old child redefines the word adorable/"kawaii" as they call it

#284 deesterbeeia

2009-12-12T10:04:00.005+08:00

bintan class trip
prom
post-prom
london/paris/spain (anglo/francais/espanol!)

12 Dec

19 Dec

25 Dec (favourite day of the year)

1 Jan 2010

6 Jan (why is this significant? i choose not to remember)

eheheheh looking back on the last post, it does raise my eyebrows now. but anyway, post-IB life has been good to most, if not all, of us. and as for tonight, i gotta feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night ;)

i still miss europe. i miss the cold wintry air stinging your cheeks in the morning, when you're fresh out from a heated room but not really fully dressed (in the layers of clothes, i mean :P). the lack of humidity. the good smells of cuisine wafting down cobblestone lanes lined with alfresco cafes on both sides. the christmas market at champs-elysees, hot steaming wine and chestnuts too hot to eat but nice in your hands. the charms of meeting up with your closest in these foreign lands, in their wintry climates and with the pervading aura of the yuletide season. the wide expanses of blue sky to stare at in the day, the dark expanses at night dotted with the few stars to be seen in such brightly lit cities. the ancient buildings, the years of history milling around you making you feel small in comparison but utterly glad to have the chance to learn more of this history.

wouldn't mind going more globetrekking one day, on student budgets or something perhaps. i'd love the exotic countries - santorini (greece), mexico, the latin american states (perhaps not brazil - dangerous lol). or the deeply cultural ones... and on. sometimes i think i don't really belong to any one country cos i love travelling that much

anyway, it really gets to you how fast things move. one day everyone is scribbling furiously on exam scripts; the next, people are applying for this-and-that university (some are actually successful already) D: and some are already making plans to move away to the uni of their choice. some are speeding down highways, fresh from driving tests (MY BTT BOOK SITS COLLECTING DUST). and by the side, neighbors planning to migrate in a matter of months (*sniff* tiffany)

oh well, life and a new take on it in seven more days! (:

#283 them flies, those lullabies

2009-11-11T19:51:00.004+08:00

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

OMOGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

EGGCITE.

ONE

ONEONEONEONEONE

ONEONEONEONE

!!!!

\O/ WINNER FIRST COMBI TO END.

OMGOMGOMGOMGMG

!!!

(spare me the raised eyebrow looks

but im sure you share teh sentiments)

today is 11 november.

friday is 13 november

ooooooooooooooooo

knvmbye! (OMG)

#282 hundred million trillion

2009-11-09T00:51:00.007+08:00

will scream jump hop around and die laughing on ~~12 nov 2009 9.30 am~~ less than 48 hours!!!!!!

be there :)

bye bye ecoooonnnsssss in a few hours!!!!!!1

#281 God bless ye merry gentlemen

2009-10-29T20:07:00.004+08:00

/edit
7... 7 7 7 7 7? hnuh. ohgee its November!

* *
5 Dibs on life when you're about to start A Big Exam:
1. The Christmas tree is apparently going up tomorrow morning
2. Have a nasty ~~hilarious~~ memory of me shrieking (shrilly) GET IT OFF MEEEEEE when a spider somehow got onto my shirt (while running down to Cluny Court to say hi and bye to JSim and Elvie and completely killed their ears)
3. Gluteus maximus hurts to maximum for some reason
4. Has eaten Ghim Moh chicken rice + carrot cake for 2 days in a row now. FATS ):
5. Godspeed to all until ~~12 Nov~~ 18 Nov :D

#280

2009-10-25T23:48:00.003+08:00

Reposting this (passages down below) from Alena's Limegreenpiggy. One reason being that it (as is so characteristically her) speaks honestly and richly, and another, digs quite deep in considering the situation that I believe most students our age are in right now - counting down the less-than-your-toes/fingers days to the big big big exams. GG, i say, but sometimes all we need is a little reminder about where we plan to be headed. And this really spoke to me; thanks girl you're the bomb! (: Always remember, our poem The Thousandth Man by Rudyard Kipling - and Spinach! xx

today during p&p worship prac i was suddenly flooded & reminded of God's amazing blessings :)

for block test 1, i was chocked full with band pracs for syf, H3 test, & worship pracs (still leading p&p then); for block test 2, the weekend before the bulk of the papers, i was occupied the whole saturday and >half of sunday doing youth sunday stuff; for prelims, i neglected some subjects and slacked off quite occasionally doing things like going to the airport and camping in front of the comp to sound horns (mousehunt).

yet God has proven amazingly faithful, and while my results aren't stellar, they're more than i deserve and i truly truly am thankful beyond words.

throughout this year there's been so many times that i've strayed, so many things that i've been distracted by. i can't even begin to count the number of times i've led or played for worship and felt like a freaking hypocrite because i'm telling ppl to not do the very things i've committed. there's even some really shameless moments that i count the number of hours i spend in church a weekend (7-10 hrs) and calculate that if i spent it studying instead i might get more As.

but God is God, and He has pulled me through. He who sees all my horrible thoughts and shameful deeds, He has still showered me boundlessly with blessings and love. sometimes when even i can't stand myself, He reaches out His hand to hold mine, to touch my heart. He offers His embrace, and even His shoulder for me to cry on.

how do our human words: awesome / amazing / wonderful / magnificent etc even vaguely begin to describe Him? i think chris tomlin got it best when he said 'indescribable, incomparable' :)

i don't know what i will get for As, but above all, i know that He will be with me as i strive to run this last mile in my JC life. that He is the one who will cheer me on, offer me water, wipe my sweat away. whatever the wretched piece of paper that i get in Feb/Mar '10 says, i really hope that i will be at peace, because it is all in His plan, & because He knows my future.

thank You, Lord :)

'My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.' Psalm 62:1-2

And on a sidenote, I'm having (a little) trouble settling back down to work after all the surpassing levels of fun I've been having (uncharacteristically, before my Most Major Exam since PSLE) the past few days. So this kinda helps too yeah :) FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS JAYNEEEE

#279 Define starstruckk

2009-10-18T03:22:00.008+08:00

Dear IB,

My life would ~~rock~~ suck without you. ♥

Xoxo

Jayce!

***

I'm breaking the hiatus because it's mother 3.30 AM and I'm trying to read Padi Cluck HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA and it's not working clearly, I'm catching up on Grey's Season 6 Epi 5 on Youtube, and been on PC Page 76 for the past 15 minutes. Oh and i'm deathly hungry too I wouldn't mind going to Newton/Ghim Moh now except the latter's closed, and I don't think Mother would be happy with me going to Newton at this hour alone. And I've turned MSN back on for until tomorrow morning. Retard

So yes, Exams. I refuse to talk about it simply because it's on most people's lips now, what's to be said has already been said :) Just that, 16 more days to go!!! - and 25 to FREEDOM

In other news, school has ended, and not just "school has ended", but in the ~~very very~~ big, I-have-completed-12-years-of-formal-pre Uni-education way. Of all the things I feel about it, Nostalgia plays a pretty big role. So the last time I talked abt it was during lunch w Sam and Darren at Breko's on Wed/Thurs I think... Thurs? :) (My 3.35AM memory is kaput) We were digging into some of our best memories of Y5/Y6, and the occasional "when you were still with us in .5" days. But at the end of the day, looking back at everything that's gone past in 2008 but more so, THIS year - there's no ass way I would've traded Corinthians/Joppans. Even though the ugly truth is I barely had anything in that class - except post-assembly and recesses, but it was The Class all the same. And a couple of my closest girlfrs are from .14 too :) Who says school is the only way to get to know people!

And really, where would you EVER find a class that has:

1. Girlfriend with whom you celebrate the first of (nearly) every month with

2. Crisply accented Epitome of Grace/Narrator/Duchess, all in one

3. "Nothing" yet "Everything"

4. Someone who makes you go Dizzy Frizzy

5. Second Rafflesian seat-mate (at one point) in 2008, out of only 2 in the school

6. Posh! Pink Dolphin! :)

7. Cobra starship fan, and having random discussions about music, life, veterinary science...

8. Brilliant 45-fosho-pointer, amazing in Theatre, Drama

9. You were my "chair" on the last day of school! Another random-discussion-friend

10. Big Brown Guy, most serious convo ever (ironically) started with "F*****CCCCCK...K...K!!" (not my word ah), and the only one who shares my Alien Combination of BCEM

11. The New Zealander

12. The Sailor, Driver, Pilot (with Private License s'more, DON'T MESS) all in one

13. Another sailor, huge ego, uses your camera to take photo of other ppl's rears D:

14. Dancer with a passion for buying real colourful clothing/shoes on a regular basis

15. The one who owns the entire Math HL level

16. And ditto 15, but who whines about "failing" (and in Chem class too!) HAHA

17. Seldom had a convo with that doesn't contain some sort of horrendous insult

18. Canoeist, artist, brilliant photographer & photoblogger

19. The Machinistic Clock in Centrestage - "tick, tock, tick, tock..."

20. Who uses Findmuck, to Mind**ck

21. Badminton player, the one who can stealthily own us in Chem

22. The Brunt of 3's "WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH" chant HAHAHA

23. Master Dracomancer

Like we have sometimes said, this is what makes our class tighter - the fact that we're all so haphazardly diverse, with such extraordinary interests, characters, qualities, that we become truly incapable of forming Cliquey Cliques but instead Mould into one Happy Class :D

And the rest? Those who aren't in my class, but who have made some sort of significant impact on my time in IB anyway. This one is more for my memories. Hopefully these people will still be in my addressbook/phonebook/some on Speed-Dial 10 years, 20 and 30 down the road. Provided I haven't lost this blog:

1. Where would you find a Penguin in the Equatorial Region, except here? {etrina

2. I will be back as much as I can to see you next year - incredibly smart and funny girl, you can and will always pull your way righttttttt through :) Samantha

3. CHEMISTRY CLASS WOULDVE SUCKED WITHOUT YOU. Your face graces this post. How honoured HAHAHAH SPAZZFRIEND. Kimberlian

4. First girl I met/talked to in AC and OG, I will remember those REALLY SAD "fellow Lab Rat with Reena" days. Food trail + Prom shopping after IB! :D Chloe

5. GDC - the Beloved Calculator Ginny Charles

6. Used to have Absolutely Crazy Convos where a lot of it was - longdrawnout words... We need those back after IB!!! Natalie Koh

7. Always regarded with a HUGE amount of unfailing respect, for your love for Christ and your behaviour towards others Zhuoer

8. Want the best for you, though we need to have a good talk someday. Don't worry about things too much - the best is always yet to be :) Felicia

9. Devilish Workpads, Assessed IAs on Perfumes as Aphrodisiacs, Hair Extensions!!! Honestly! :P Darli

10. Almost-1.8m worth of the craziest, incredibly hilarious jokes/video resources/random lunches, for which the ~2 years of IB life would be damnably different without. Won't forget the Incident of the Breaking Bamboo, Dancing, either Teemoo

11. You say "bounce" I say "how high", born on the most Romantic Day of the Year Yiwei

12. Introduced to Primers, and first ACS Dinner 08 Elliott

13. How many people can say they have a true blue (SPASTIC) Filipino friend, who steals your Filipino biscuits! Karlo

14. "L*****poo!" pisses you off bigtime! Caleb

15. Imp texted at least half of Primers referring to me as GI Jayne. WTS! Russell Chan

16. Toot-turd-poo/Poophead/Bully or be bullied/Sensitive New Age Twi-Guy Sze Jet

17. Dunnohowmany nuisance calls with your gang (that even when its not you I think its you), insanity, Pink Dog Pencilcase, horrendously kinked up mind :P Jeremy Sim

18. Glad to have kicked you out of the Cigs Leonard

19. Takes such great care of No. 2. I better be one of the bridesmaids! HEE. Darren

20. "Janey janey janey jane too much work makes you insane" in Bio. ONLY KNEW HOW TO SPELL MY NAME THIS YEAR ): Vikram

21. Diva, an absolute Diva. There's no other word for it. Jerrold

22. "Have you walked into a pillar today?" - Idea of a greeting! ): Tim Loh

And of groups, there's:

1. FireAC: Which I balked out on early this year, but it doesn't mean I'm far away... I just need to find my proper footing again - and two weeks ago I came closer to it than I've gotten for a long long while

2. and the Chemistry tuition group: Quite new, but nevertheless! Oh yes it has GROWN from 4 to 7! Memorable: Surviving the Terminator, Terminator inside jokes, Terminator homework, meals before/after Tuition with Terminator (CARROT CAKE, CHICKEN RICE, omnomnom), having 3 of them Exploding into hysterics after I nearly got whacked on the head by the school's gantry/barrier on Friday (-.-), Chemistry Craziness.

AH. What more can be said? :) Now all we have to do left is to gun on for THIS last stretch, and mind you, we ARE gonna break the stage on 6 Jan 2010 :D And before that (post-exams)? There's no way of knowing, except that I anticipate it's gonna be brilliant, brillianter, brilliantest. Always praying the best for all of us as the Cohort of 08-09. And in PC's words, I'm 100% sure it'll never become '10-11 LOL. But that's not a reason to burn up our uniforms.

It's almost 4.15AM. Time to finish Grey's, a bit of Paddy, and there ends the all-nighter. My brain has begun shutting down anyway

#278 the inner narcissist

2009-10-08T22:50:00.006+08:00

Admit it, who's not one to some extent :P So... Pictures say a thousand words, don't they? I'll let them do the talking. Last post for a long while - it's only appropriate that it's a photo post - photos, what I love best :P

Bits of life pre-mugging period, post-prelims!

Bong's Eighteenth @ Sushi Tei HV :)

- there're a lot more of these where this came from hurhurrr

Bintan - complete honeymoon getaway

Sunsets, stars, seashells by the seashore

Marmee smarmee! :P xoxo

Thanksgiving Dinner :)

1 Oct 2009!

Baking a Surprise + Breko's Cafe @ HV :)

The Pinks :)

Grew up with for four years,

laugh/cry/shout/scream/play/break burettes and pipettes,

BeechFests + Spinach

what more could you ask for.

happy belated, yingming and sarah CHEANG the 5/6-sister HAHAHA

and from today :)

Study buddies! - Sam + Darren, Pet

Mother (yesterday, of my class photo): All your class boys look so... boyish. But who's the boy in the centre? He looks so much older than the rest

Me: ?!?! That's my CT!

HAHA.

6.5 and 6.14 Class Photos :D

Neil Tan: Have you seen The Pinoy?

Darren: No. Go to Lucky Plaza. If he's not there, check the Philippines

Liam will never forgive me

I love you Liam! HAHA :D

Gorgeous shots of the setting 5.30 PM sun glowing through the trees :)

Pretty pretty! Andddd the rest are on Facebook :) Which is now also "non-existent"/prohibited/deleted.

Facebook - tick

MSN - tick

Skype - always offline anyway too lazy t turn off auto sign-in

Hmm. I can't bloody concentrate on anything tonight. It's not my fault! Well, not really. But hey, 26 more days (now, 25) people. It's time to buckle down, and aim high! Juxtapose! Whoopee

I am going to be a HERMIT CRAB.

Cantakerous is a complicated word!

/ziyang: I WILL NOT LOSE ANYTHING IN BINTAN IN NOV. I BET YOU MY $2 NOTE :D

/bang: DITTO FIRST PART.

#277 make them skeletons dance

2009-09-28T19:41:00.003+08:00

today was seriously a day when i thought murphy's law descended upon me:

2 am - bottom of your stomach falls out into a bucket of cold water *metaphorically, that is* when i realize my iPod (something i don't not live with for more than 6 hours at a stretch i realize -.-)

6 am - open one eye after a restless sleep, only to have the first waking word being *F* (i'm sorry, rather bad of me)

7-8.30 am - pointless trips across singapore costing $30 at least

12 nn - stuck in the middle of nowhere, increasingly restless, not sure if i should go home or return to changi

1 pm - about to cross road then realized this was where a freaking car rammed up the pavement (last Friday), losing control, sparks and smoke coming out from the car - just where this friend and i were standing like, less than 5 minutes ago. Ps. the car tried jolting itself back to life after a couple minutes and actually succeeded, but something had scraped off the bottom. and i stood there gaping stupidly (by then 3-4 m across the road) not really thinking straight until it'd driven off. anyway it completely put me off jaywalking today... and a long time more

2 pm - ferry company got my hopes up earlier for 3 hours then realized the one they found was a green model... not mine. and not name-engraved either. the irony!

6.30 pm - *words fail me* Purple slab of music-playing metal found on ferry.

yargh!

i sound soooo dramatic LOL. but anyway it taught me one thing - my sixth sense "poked' me twice yesterday to check my stuff before leaving the ferry, but i decided to heck with it, i had all my bags anyway. stupid really, since most of what i do goes by my instinct (given enough reason is involved, but reason doesn't get you everywhere and no im not going all TOK on you)

and also to take better care of my things. this year has been an absolute RECORD. started w my 2 month old mobile in january, Macbook in Term 2-3?, wallet twice/thrice (most recently new/borrowed-from-mom wallet in a taxi transiting between friends' places -.-), yesterday... well. so far i've been rather lucky, i must say... everything found their way back to me :)

...

it's like lost puppies sniffling their way back home

okay never mind :) leastways i'm all grins now and to those handful who tasted a little of my wth-moodiness/grumpiness/irritability/(and slight hope) at some point today: HEHEH

things to look forward to -

1. Ugly Truth w those Animals HAHAHA Penguin & Flea

2. Dinner @ CQ

3. Baking + surprises + birthday lunches w the Four (+ most recently, Five)

4. AJ Day (more of a study date than anything, HI amanda! :D)

and then,

5. 35 more days, starting tomorrow. feeling slightly vindictive hodeeho!

okay not really, about the last one

(edit)

/alena: HAHAHA took me a while to register what you meant! HOW MUCH $$$ ARE YOU GOING TO PAY ME :D and yup i was going to *kekeke* text you abt *1 Oct*

#276 good mourning and goodbye

2009-09-24T17:03:00.002+08:00

SEASON 6 IS HEREEEE!!!

...
stupid IB
*snarl*

#275 something wild this way comes

2009-09-22T16:03:00.006+08:00

So I was thinking, like I've been for awhile, I'd do something really drastic to my crowning glory after medical interviews (when I know I won't scare the living daylights out of anyone) - and hopefully that would find me still in Singapore. Hopefully.

And no, it's not a mid-life crisis. It's for fun. Doesn't it all grow out again anyway :P

Pixie cut #1

Pixie cut #2

Quizzes by Quibblo.com

Not to bias anyone's choices, but so far, the responses garnered have been mostly discouraging - ranging from dropped jaws accompanied with goggling eyes, to exuberant exclamations of horror, and to gleeful grins of "let's see you even start to try"

Let's see how fate plays itself out :)

#274 Paris burns bright tonight

2009-09-19T22:53:00.004+08:00

Plans are up and coming for the "4 bimbos + 1 Ming" - quoting Alena

Ming will explode if we include her in the Pinks. But anyway,

I very eggcite, can't wait for 30 Sept & 1 Oct already!!! :D

Hello world 4 more papers to go and I'm just about buckling down to it now it's 11 pm already ohmygeegee!

Sad that Sze's gone off to London now, but glad she'll be back at Christmas (possibly the best, awesomest, favouritest time of my every year). Sending her off at the airport today was really a mix of feelings... I really thank God for coming to know her so increasingly well over the past few months - whether through, as she quipped, "sharing, chilling, tuition..." Hi Sze if you ever read this you're always the Saucilicious Sis HAHAHA :D wonder woman in a bottleeee

She's still on the plane!! ):

2009-09-15T18:16:00.003+08:00

8 more papers to go

7 days in a week

6 hours of sleep during exam time

5 papers past and feeling less than excited

4 medical undergraduate years *at the very least*

3 bonus points *kip yer fingas crossd, Huck*

2 years of International Baccalaureate

1 beautiful Diploma

doesn't life look so darndy awesome? :P

chem p1+2, econs p1+2, english p1 are OVAAA. *that word also means i need to study for bio which i've abandoned for 2 weeks and (to exaggerate slightly) can only remember that oxaloacetate is the last step in the Kreb's Cycle & Ribulose is an enzyme in the Calvin Cycle*

my most amusing moment of the day was being sooooooo cold during chem bcos the audi is ACS' version of the Arctic, and my facial/cheek muscles were spontaneously spasming. not in the i'm-throwing-a-Prelims-fit-because-i-was-slacking-last-night way, but because it was SO COLD. just before the 15min "no more going to toilet" mark came, i cheonged for the door.

pat thong was guarding the girls' loo door outside and stared. (at this point i was dancing up and down, hopping around in the sunlight heating up the railings outside the audi) mervyln goh came out too, and they were all "i thought you wanted to go to the toilet?" and when i said i was thawing... ... ... they snickered very audibly. "i'm outside here to wait for you to go in there *points to toilet* not to watch you thaw!"

in other news, the three top blockbusters of fall/winter that i'm really rather looking forward to. or two blockbusters, and one chick flick for tweens:

kudos to amanda for telling me about this one, xoxo

alice in wonderland

new moon - twilight sequel part 2 (second official trailer guys!)

embedding is disabled on request ):

in my honest opinion right, the first two both have johnny depp, which will be a bit of a distractant from the main plot :) the first in particular has jude law and heath ledger - whom many girls i know absolutely lurvvvvvv...vvve. and lily cole! (whom runway-watchers *cough amanda* would like/love - perhaps? :P)

the third. is for downloading on your computer because it's not really-worth-my-$6-student-discount-at-the-cathay. unless you wanna watch a more-muscular-with-abs jacob black (taylor lautner) and his Red-Indian werewolf/human pack shirtless because there really are a lot of them this time. it comes out in november after IB so "see how". kristen stewart is admittedly still rather pretty in a unique way though

and there is a Macbook Pro (and iPhone 3GS) in my house, but it's not mine ):

i shall now proceed to vectors and statistics, before another 5 points reincarnates magically on my score

Ps. Quincy (name inspired by the Iguana in Foxtrot comics) came to life on my phone today during a bus ride home hohohoho it's partly made out of mathematical symbols. How ominous.

And before that while waiting for 165, a rather tall bamboo tree snapped/bent and keeled right over the wall of the expat condo it was behind...

- and arched *dangling, less than a metre above* my head

I had my iPod plugged in so I only became aware of it when bright green leaves began dancing in front of my nose

#272

2009-09-13T17:36:00.005+08:00

i realize i've always had a thing for black and white photography,

or really (sickeningly) colourful ones *Juicy Couture*!

which is why it's awesome to see this on your study table :)

(one only)

i shall now go back to stardee ~~or trying to.~~

Godspeed to all of us for the few coming days

#271

2009-09-11T01:21:00.006+08:00

the moon looks like cheddar cheese tonight

mooncakes with (separate) fillings of soursop, D24 durian, and pomelo tomorrow, yummz :)

has just spent last 30 minutes googling outdoor activities in kaikoura, for some unfathomable reason. or i just feel like going to new zealand suddenly hahahaha

bye bye!

/edit:

You know, I do miss, in some way, having all 43 of us together in the same room, singing the same songs of worship, simply the act of coming together to celebrate the joy of Christ. Will there ever be another day of this?

My richest gain I count but loss
And pour contempt on all my pride.

#270 when the call came down to this

2009-09-06T15:14:00.003+08:00

ten years from now -

where will you be?

where will i be?

what will be we doing?

HIATUS

(not working)

2009-09-01T01:43:00.007+08:00

how do you know things are getting into the heat?

- when your safari top sites includes the school's LMS portal.

(alongside the usuals like email accounts, the all-domineering FB, Thatsecretside, Deartimetraveller, Winterchanterelles, Jtz, Youtube :D)

the mother called me today and after a brief chat contemplating *fantasy, but a possibly materializing fantasy IF things don't work out here - touch wood* migration to Canada, the all-memorable -

"what if you just dropped medicine, and we all just go travelling around the world together?"

*pause*

"where do you think we're gonna get the money?"

"oh ya." -.-

DISTRICT NINEEEEE. killed half my brain cells, and then killed ALL my gastric cells because after 2 hours of watching aliens + humans blow each other up, and shards of biological tissues spraying everywhere -

"OH MY GOD."

"so... anyone wants to eat prawn sushi now?" - jialong

"i'm not paying you back for the ticket!" - bong to jiarong

LOLLL

yup, last class outing before the exams, so sad. pretty glad i could make it (finally) this time though, it's been rather a while. of course now there's the diving in philippines (NO DUCK EMBRYO KTHZ) or the *cough* activities in Bali to look forward to at the end of the year, with this insane bunch of 23 people.

speaking of insane -

awesome teacher's day celebrations, seriously just cracked us all up - what with the sashays of the senior admin, the random viet dance, and sam adding in sparky little comments into mel and my ears.

and...

HAPPY AJ DAY #18

Hello amanda dear this is a tribute to our many months of friendship by now hahaha so sad we stopped recognizing AJ Day for this entire chunk but now we've revived it and i'm sorry mom has taken over AJ Day today with IPL :P butttt in spirit, we are, love ya and for the continuous support you've given over the agesss, as well as the all the baking sessions and stuff - that we must continue when we're old toothless and graying :) HAHA. anyway rightzzz, pls study hard for prelims + IB nov kkz we'll own it together along w all the rest of our darlings. stay funky + always our source of fash + stash + everything rash *okay jkjk not this one i just wanted it to rhyme* :P and being my ATM *bigger joke here* i owe you $10 but you owe.... HAHAH. photos with DIANA one day! xoxo, you know you love meeeee

ah.

/edit:

FML LOL?

#268 lead us not into temptation

2009-08-26T17:54:00.002+08:00

Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer came early to town. did these carollers ever consider the alliteration, or was it there accidentally? Oh but anyhow, *sniffles sniffles* it's like trying to breathe with the N95-duckybeak. Hate wearing that thing, it makes me faint and i swear its the carbon dioxide but the mother insists that air is properly filtered in and out.

Quack!

The mother is also bringing back yam dumplings from Dintaifung tonight YAY :D I love those things, they're the next best food creation after Thai, Italian, Mexican, Japanese. Yup those are my favourites, *hint hint hint* teehee.

Felt pretty good to be back in school, despite all the work (fancy going into Desmond Yap's class and being slapped with 10 Calculus worksheets and 5 test papers) HL3 was uber slack though it became a rather gastronomic discussion that resulted in said cravings for them yam dumplings :P

On a sidenote, based on SOMEONE'S response *glare* i'd like to clarify that the previous post was about a dearly beloved family member -.- humtumz!

If ever medicine doesn't work out for me *hopefully not of course*, I'll turn to the toys industry. AHAHA there was a time i used to wonder what it was like to be circus actor in Cirque du Soleil - trapezes, rings of fire, working with uh, tigers and horses. (Oh yes, used to go riding quite a lot but obviously now i haven't time... it's been almost 6 years since I last sat on one I think)

Got thrown off a white stallion before, heheh.

Thoughts all over the place again today :/ 7 7 7 7 7 7

#267 you know i'm a dreamer

2009-08-24T22:37:00.002+08:00

some days i look expectantly at my phone,
sometimes hoping you'd call
many times i'd rather just hear your voice at least one more time
- but i know you won't.

not through singtel or satellites anyway.

so here ends probably the toughest or the nastiest
or the worst week ever of my entire life
well not ALL has ended, per se
i've still a weird crummy feel about something
that i probably shouldn't have a weird crummy feel about
- but i don't even know what exactly it is.

haven't stepped back into school proper for classes

since everything began -

5 more official school days to go

will it feel weird?

let's work at getting out of this rut
let's smile again
let's play and embrace the world beyond our fingertips

and one day - home sweet home

#266 but the greatest of these is -

2009-08-23T00:10:00.001+08:00

tired, i am - but so is everyone here

faith of brothers, sisters

standing and staring into nothing -

thinking, reflecting, remembering

contemplating one of the greatest people i know

night watches. our last one

smile of reverence

tomorrow - this is it

the end of things (or not)

#265
2009-08-20T12:25:00.002+08:00

DELETED.

-.-

sighhh

):

#264 live high.

2009-08-12T20:41:00.002+08:00

somewhere up there, the old Bard William Shakespeare is staring down at all of us IB students, chuckling malevolently to himself. ~~possibly most of all at interpretations of king lear being an incestuous old man.~~ in any case, i will be in the company of my favorite old man for just one more day. ONE MORE DAY.

press on and hold on jaycee! :D

delusional, so delusional

#263 fall 09 - a love more ponderous than...

2009-08-10T20:04:00.006+08:00

* * *

stupid bandwidth. i'm far too lazy. nevermind,

gives more screen space of... :P

a four day hiatus from school; a slightly longer NDP weekend than most

ladeedum. spent it eating + eating + eating + ...

T1-T2-T3 + ION + NDP family dinners.

mother in KL: "do you want anything from KLIA/KLCC?"

me: "er... nah its okay"

wonderful, now its buckle down time

haven't i said that for agessss? :P

~~sometimes~~ i don't feel like 17 years old

#262 you say ah-choo, i say flu!

2009-08-06T20:24:00.003+08:00

eurrggghhhhh. put 2 plus 2 together.

If You Seek Flu/Fever

/edit: august is my cursed month. i take days off once a year, and i remember last year i also took off in august. FML watch out august i will conquer you one day.

lalalalaalalalalaaaaaaa poobah i wanna go for danceeeee ):

#261 dreams made of fluff

2009-07-31T21:26:00.003+08:00

i'm dreaming of a day when we being rid once and for all of all that says IB/Ecole du monde - will be able to:

1. go on a foodie tour around singapore, searching out all manner of delectables from hawker centres, cozily tucked away eating joints in unknown estates, etc yummyz <3

2. picnic in a park, fishing, enjoying the sun (Labrador Park's probably the only option lol)

3. enjoy cold wet grass on a clear starry night. i remember how we used to do that in new zealand during the best school trip i've had in my life. you think singapore has a lot of stars? the kiwi sky is ablaze and dotted rightleftcenter with stars stars and more stars. i miss that!!

4. is the cross-European tour still on? i'd die to sit in a alfresco cafe in France, enjoy the scenery in Spain (bullfights and spaniard matadors? hurhur)... or just sit on some grassy patch watching the European world go by :) no shopping included!

5. one day i will do the things i've always wanted to try: bungee jumping, trekking another ice mountain (like we did in NZ, despite the below zero temperatures ohmy!), para-sailing, parachuting, skiing (again, maybe victoria island or something), meet jamie oliver HAHAH okaykiddingnotlikely. MICHELIN STAR but no $$$$

tomorrow's official AJ Day no. dunnowhat already! :) 1st of every month - amanda + jayne chill out day hahaha. and tmw there's so much time together yay! dinner @ dempsey's house/barracks + drama night + aftersupper!? can't wait. oh and curling at her place perhaps.

dreams are made of more than fluff.

#260 our song to sing

2009-07-28T23:02:00.002+08:00

i find it funny how in brief sojourns onto MSN over the weekend,

at least 20 personal nicknames practically scream something or another about the dreaded IOC

in all its various nicknames, twisted acronyms, and what have you's

(i am holding onto my weekday hiatuses so there!)

yes i have started numbering my posts, i wonder when i'll hit 300 heheheh.

(and yes, i can count. like during awards rehearsal:

"count on me singaporeeee..."

"yes, with the GDC!!" D: that was soooo lame ahahaha)

back to Disabled! i found out today i was doing the wrong poem, thank God i open my mouth sometimes.

-.-

Wonka NERDS for the win! nerd nerd nerd nerd HAHAHA

/valentino: u da mother of all retards :)

2009-07-26T19:29:00.003+08:00

i gave up my liverpool fc ticket offered by the bagpipe band.

i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket i gave up my liverpool fc ticket

... to go shopping @

tell me im not a retard.

2009-07-25T17:10:00.002+08:00

lalalala
its such a lazy saturday afternoon
wanted to do work but wound up waking up at like past noon
progressively grouchier - lear is such a bad tempered old man!!!
kind of la.

reading papers, checking/eating yesterday's baking,
relinquishing the DRAMA from yest evening :/
wanting to go out but too lazy too.
(sam went to ION just now!
mom gave me vouchers for Forever21 that are still unused)

i think i'd just die (IB-wise) if i broke my msn hiatus now. heehee.
but actually, i think msn might be less distracting than skype
SKYPE SKYPE. so few ppl use it. recently added szeminyyy (:
tweet tweet tweet

rambling. there are no clouds in the sky!
i wanna go fly kite (:
AHAHA WTH oh and ginny reminded me of my night biking.
I LOVE IT TOO MAN. go round and round on F1 circuit when nobody's looking
4am zipzipzip

suri cruise is so unbelievably adorable <3

today is the 7th anniversary of my residence on this fake hill.

ps. to a certain english classmate/stalker :P now u can stop quoting my WTF everytime u see me in sch >( HAHA

2009-07-21T20:01:00.002+08:00

for the first and last time i'm swearing openly on this blog:

What

The

Fuck

seriously. i was expecting to screw up,

but not this ( insert infinity ) much. it's not that its pathetically horrible

cos frankly it isn't. it's just that i could've done better.

didn't have that much time to study (as only 4 ppl know why)

but -

*rant*

math, fine. spent only 10 minutes on in total, reading notes just the morning of our papers.

had tuition for english.

chinese AHAHAHA my only seven *muah*

my HLs.... i've nothing to say. was expecting econs,

definitely not bio and chem ):

and i also need to stop swearing cos i've way overused a few select words today

besides very unintentionally swearing openly a couple times today.

(apologia)

anyway, ironically, just spent entire afternoon out since sch ended w half the Four, and Ym (: that was quite a cheer-upper, refused t talk abt grades but caught up on ages ages ages of stuff. met a few old friends at HC too, and Starbx afterwards was pretty awesome - banana muffin and chilled mushroom/beef salad.

quotes of the day:

"you know when i was running for council, this *@&*$@ came up to me and said 'i think you'll get voted in if you don't wear your specs'. wtf right?! but i did it anyway hurhurrr"

"JAYNE OMG I SWEAR YOU'RE FAIRER NOW!!!" (eheheheh)

"stop hitting her knee trying to get the reflex!! i tell you when you become a doctor you're gonna wind up breaking your patient's knee and i don't think you'll get more $$$ from it!" (-.-)

clearly i came home to emo LOL D: aiya i'll be fine soon enough,

but just need to remind myself to work properly.

i'm alright, i'm ok :)

...... -.-

2009-07-20T21:27:00.003+08:00

i shall resist the urge to blog after today

i shall start resisting going online

this week this week! because otherwise i'll feel really guilty

latter part of last week, was, in summary:

fri - little children babysit, catching up, harry potter, 3AM

sat - CB lunch, popping by school, BAKING

sun - uni fair, chill in a AJ Day Fastfw, transformers

"[the movie's] not called transformers, it's called megan fox" - manda

FOX!!! (hahaha sorry kim she's hot :P)

tmw - old times sake, for old friends' make

wed - hi phatz duke girl sorry finally we meet! rock band ahahaha

thurs - szeeeee minnzzz

fri - terminator! O.O

sat - hillsong concert!!!

sun - family day @ da vinci

slowly start cancelling off each day as it comes. will study after this crazy shiz is over.

mother is tempting me with these two things, i dont think i should but -

1. Henrietta, by Coast (and yes, tried it already, don't wanna wear it for prom)

2. EHEHEH

(although after tmw's results... i dont know anymore AHAHAHHA D: ooblech)

2009-07-16T04:37:00.002+08:00

somewhere in the Book it said

IT IS DONE

well now it really is.

ABOUT

AS HAPPY AS A

CHIMP/ORANG UTAN

WITH -

(nevermind the fact that it's 5 AM now

and i've had about 7 hours

uninterrupted sleep total in the past 4 days)

YEAHHHHHH

2009-07-10T00:30:00.004+08:00

first post of july!

the exams are finally almost ending but it makes no difference to me since i've been treating this whole episode since the start of this week like a real joke. last week was.... no time to study, i shan't go into that. this week was like "oh its okay, screw mid years" D: proof in a text to kim today, i said sth along the lines of - but it's a holiday. (what holiday?)

.... killed 5 hours in starbucks but whatev it was fun so not like i wasted time in that sense. HI DIDDO THE DINOSAUR

daydreaming in the evening staring across the boundary wall of my place. briefly felt like climbing a tree? there was this point of time when i was younger i'd always wanna go africa to like see the real african lions cos i thought it'd be pretty cool to see one up close. again, when i was younger. cubs are still so cute though

uhhhh wth i know. GSS! prom dress?

hehehe sometimes i still think it'd be really cool to have an older bro. hmm. apparently, he would have been called James or like Jordan. more likely James. there's this whole J thing. LOL ahhh so cool :) but ohwell.

/edit

found out sth big today. i'm still thinking abt it,

weighing my options. sometimes you don't know if the choice you make

is the best you ought to take? i dont know if i should talk to anyone about it

but i do know: i dont wanna make the worst mistake of my 17+ years of life

D: cos it's not about me

it's not a trust thing. it's a... i respect *** privacy thing

fishsticks.

2009-06-28T11:01:00.003+08:00

who would've known? John 11:25 "He who believes in me lives even when He dies"

10 pm and im gonna squeeze econs into 1.5 h, then QT

nothing else to say except

i'm leaving the whole of this week into Your hands.

2009-06-24T10:14:00.003+08:00

two words:

infection

morphine

the pain in the mornings (so far) is really FML

would give quite a lot to not exist for that frame of time

AAJSDKJKLRAWJKNNZM

for sake of (gross) humor, the tissue abrasion has this shape:

big round circle, long tail spanning off the side.

dont use your imagination

i have bits of holland road on my knee

other knee: scarring from the cycling crash into louee

ohmygee

visual reminders for the rest of this lifeee :/

breakfast and off to skype w petty

2009-06-16T17:09:00.003+08:00

YES YES YES YES

EE DATELINE

EXTENDED (haha)

UNTIL 15/17 JULY

!!!!!!!

i ultimate happy ttm now ahahahahaha :D

golly the last 24 hours were a mix of absolute highs and lows

no guesses what the latter was thanks to ):

but now... :D

hee hee heeeeee

i've resorted to studying in cafes whenever i slip outta the house

with my favourite vanilla/caramel non-caff ice blended and a bagel

(a couple handy magazines when i get bored)

but a rather fail internet connection

(CANT ACCESS GMAIL but blogger.com

WHAT IS THIS LOL)

in other news, i'm giving the mother the 3gS cos she lost hers

and i don't need a new phone yet anyway

(well i mean, the 3gS comes w the end of my contract;

it's way more improved than the 3g version)

just claim back the S anytime i feel like its time to change

not for a longlonglong time.

between this and this: i actually don't mind either.

options topics really rather interesting

still though, i think i'll watch House tonight. heheh

hello world :)

i hope i dont spontaneously combust when middies results are out LOL

2009-06-11T19:54:00.003+08:00

there was this strange feeling today that came around during dusk, when i realized that "whoa dude, this is it. our syllabus really is pretty much all over. and all that we now know ~~or at least are SUPPOSED TO HAVE LEARNT from listening in class~~ is all that we're ever gonna learn for the rest of our IB lives; that any fresh academic knowledge we learn after this is pretty much in UNI"

came to terms with that; now i just need motivation to study. something which i'm not doing and certainly am not doing now. LOL. and this gaga feeling resurfaced when i saw shoban's email which read something like "HEY GUYS OUR (BIO) IAs ARE GOING TO GENEVA THIS FRIDAY". then there was shadiq's affirmative. well, the expletives that arose in my head... hahaha D:

you know how when we were young, we'd read these "fairy tales" that said if you get out of the wrong side of bed, you're screwed for the rest of the day? D: not that i have a choice, since its against the wall, but. it really felt weird from the moment i got up (AT 6.30 AM HAHA) till abt 5 when i finally went home. just ultra.... jaded? for no particular reason at all. but then there were these huge awesome gaps thanks to random people, incl. pet and kim (CHEM CLASS) and kim (again -.- chillax at holland CB) :)

"eggcite eggcite" hope my threadless tees are coming soon soon soon! :D another thing to be happy about. swanky designs FTW

18 more days. "YOU DON'T KNOW MEH" - kim HAHA

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIFFERZ MY PERPETUALLY 50M AWAY NEIGHBOUR. HAHA.

/feli: a break be awesome shiz indeed ahahahha im all refreshed...and lazy now. sloth is here to stay! >D HEHEH

2009-06-06T13:33:00.004+08:00

i'm so darn distracted these days i'm getting quite pissed off at myself. like i try to churn out some notes or something on a random topic like trade and instead start surfing on everything from doll domination to latest hotspot eateries in singapore ): so at this rate my midyears are going to die.

not to mention EE and TOK hanging over my head

and for that matter, i'm flying off in a couple hours to a land of paradise and beaches... and ozzies. but its not ozzieland. anyway, i'm going for a short trip and short though it may be, it doesn't bide well for my grades. i can almost foresee the black thunderstorm and the grouchiness that will be me when my results come out

the only thing that's amusing me is how Mother Coincidence will step in at changi later. so for now,

BYE

2009-06-03T23:34:00.003+08:00

(warning: extremely surreal post cos that's how i feel right now. sounding dreamy cos i AM feeling dreamy)

sometimes you feel "empowered" enough to take a leap of faith. and an evergreen sense of optimism takes you a long long way through life with all its weird ups and downs; that even when the downs come along and drag you all the way down, you know what's golden can never be completely gone. and there starts your journey back up to the top

this week heralded a series of events, and has somehow unfolded into one a little more surprising and surpassingly pleasant than expected, might i say. question is: in passing, or built to last? that... *shrug* for now; i'm in a pretty good mood, have been for a long while now

only that my msn hiatus is still going strong, and it's probably a good thing. i'm amazed, but then again why not spend time in school doing the talking during this period of time? ;) catching up w the girls (mostly feli) at night is fair consolation

hmm some slightly disturbing goss was brought up again today though. completely unfounded, i must insist but since they are unfoundedly false, i'm more inclined to not protest vehemently but sigh in exasperation

this space will probably see less and less updates as the days go by. but i'm not feeling any pressure yet...unfortunately. and yes my thoughts are rambling up again so byebye

2009-05-29T23:27:00.004+08:00

i actually feel kinda sad that i can't be at camp 24/7 this weekend. it's something that's quite nostalgic for me i think, and my own experiences last year really do mean quite a fair bit :) so yep this year, i'm hoping my juniors will find it as pretty darn awesome as i did back then in 08. if i were back there again, there are things i'd do the same; things i'd try to do even better in.

so tomorrow i'm going in the evening and on sunday morning, for the best parts of camp i see in the schedule :P hmm. i definitely miss all the cycling. even though on day 2 it was so darn bl**** tiring but then again i felt so incredibly hyped up hahaha i had a REALLY encouraging team!

i also miss... running around the school at night, when everyone's asleep. okay like nobody knows this till now i guess, but HAHA i woke up randomly at weird times like 3-4am on camp nights, to stroll around the grounds cos the cold night breezes (esp across the astroturf, or the Y5 bridge, or the rooftop) were so damn awesome :D

and in some way or another, i miss having all the girls together.

ms runima was waxing abt Wow today so i told her that this time last year, we'd be living the life on Survivor Island, drinks (water or tea?) in hand, dinner in the other... sitting around a campfire and humming random songs, playing cards + truth/dare (it was right?) haha.

omega buffet from THREE to SIX-ISH with The Joppa Class today :D :D i can't rmb the last time i went for a class gathering; sthg invariably cropped up simultaneously each time :/ well today was pretty awesome, we ate ate and ate SO MUCH sushi, sashimi, mochis, chawanmushis and all the other 'su's and 'shi's in jap cuisine :P THE BILL FOR 11 PEOPLE WAS LIKE A METRE LONG. HAHA. and we abused the poor trainee no end. so yep, i haven't eaten anything since then, cos i feel like a Whale now for once :D

HAD THE MOST EMBARRASING MORNING EVER. thank God for Coincidence or else idk how i'd ever pay for the stupid cab ): lesson: don't EVER (LIKE EVERRRR) change ur bag sleepily in the morning before school, esp since the previous night you fell asleep without knowing and woke up in a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PART OF THE HOUSE D:

mom: imagine if you climbed over the balcony in your sleep. *snicker*

-.-

one year on, and you wonder where on earth all the time suddenly disappeared to? D: things change, people change; you try not to get lost amidst everything else and even you yourself change. haha like lambert SANG: i find it kind of funny, i find it kind of sad. well okay its not ALL sad, many things this past month have been my "pride and joy"

going on june hiatus soon AHAHA :/

2009-05-28T19:38:00.002+08:00

rarrr. the good and the bad happens. the good:

yest i sat myself down and said okay im going to OWN world lit tonight. 8 hours later, at midnight plus i was all smiles :) I DONT CARE IF ITS GNA BE REDRAFTED ONE MORE TIME. draft two is done!

and then the oh-so-bad:

this one - sentimental. all this IB work's keeping me so busy (okay i slack a lot in between assignments like surfing/watching tv/youtube :P) so there's like no time to talk much and i really quite hate that? like yknow besides work there's LIFE to attend to HAHAH i dont think ive actually spoken to teh mother v much in the past couple days... and "hello how was surgery/school" doesnt count at all D: and yeah the close friends you wanna talk to but everyone's bogged down w stuff, so no go for now :/ it's like "oh damn that's long" even if its only one day but still! GRAH i miss talking to some people.

and jo coming round on tues reminded me of that, it was great catching up though. i soooo swear, june hols will have SOME allowance for catching up :) that said, it's quite hard getting a date w alena joanna sarah right now, cos like. OUR TIMETABLES CLASH. D:

paul cheong killed me for my EE ): which means gonna hv t work on it some more over the hols = disturb revision time = regret not working on it last year = ):

i think there's sth wrong w my phone like ppl say they sent stuff but im not getting anything? D: its like 2 weeks ago i suddenly got 10 all at once from the previous day. gross its actually probably singtel's fault ):

one bright spark of the day:

took a good swim after enjoying a cuppa 7-11 slurry (suddenly forgot the name ZOMG D: ahHhhh) brain freeze thing + magic elves cadbury chocolate on the bus ride home :) speaking of buses, i've convinced a few more ppl this week that YES I KNOW HOW TO TAKE IT >( not space cadet okay *6.14 inside joke*. LOL

2009-05-24T12:27:00.003+08:00

few assignments have managed to miff/piz me off like nyaa gold logging does but yep anyways i hath finished!!! :) :) :) 147 pages and 25355 words later, i would cry if a "tumbler of Starbucks coffee spilt over my keyboard and my screen went kaput" *COUGHCOUGH AMANDA SUN COUGH COUGH* :P which is why i'm now loading all my world lit, EE and NYAA into a thumbdrive hurhur

time for a break. i fell asleep on a chair last night and woke up at 8am this morning with a very sore back and the sun shining right into my face >( ahwell at least there's some goodness in today - meeting Pet in 2 hours time at thee Nat Lib! :D and jaunt to PS after, Jeanyip rang up after a v v v long time D:

in other news, am now hankering after a stripey Fox kini and a metallic brown Topshop parka but wondering when on heavenandearth will i be able to go check them out? and lack of $$$ too, spent too much on good food this past week - coffee bean, hawker desserts, yakun's kaya, island creamery, provence bakery...! ):

and moving down memory lane, i remember how alena and i used to come up with all sorts of amazing crap that was... all related to FOOD GLORIOUS FOOD. hahaha i swear it's NOT A COINCIDENCE we really loved trying out different food joints when we were younger! :) i mean we still do but now there's like IB and A levels right :/ so yep, some things that warm me up a little, ohsosentimental:

1. signing off every email w "creative dishes": "cream tarts & blueberry ganaches, jayne!" or "green apples dipped in banana cream, alena!" HAHAHA

2. "SPINACH IS LOVE. i'll die without it."

"okay, I SPINACH YOU!" (this one really redefined vee day in a girls' school - spinach for v day presents?)

3. "teachers are friends, not food."

... there were many more food references. you could write a world lit essay on it :)

rum tum... tummy (tugger!) - CATS. hahaha. memory is playing in my head now :) yesterday it was a rather vulgar song hurhur.

2009-05-23T00:43:00.005+08:00

twenty-second may

tonight was honestly, a beautiful night :) or rather, if you girls (sarah and jo) read this: you girls were simply superb onstage tonight, and i kept thinking how long it'd been since i'd last seen you two perform and tonight was the best i'd ever seen!! if not for IB, like i said i'd be watching it a second time

but above all else, today i missed having the Clique around more than ever, it's been really a long time and well. 4 years of high school, esp. the last 2 (we spent those trawling the corridors BLOCKING IT cos we walk abreast, chilling and ponning random classes... except alena? HAHA) and so. :) here's to the us four girls,

JASJ always:

AHAHAHA GROW OLD TOGETHER HUH!

(sarah will get married first, remember? :D)

/80: HAHA ADAMMMM :) pity pity but ah well.

/valentino: i know, i know *nodnod* :P

2009-05-21T21:07:00.004+08:00

okay the one who i was rooting for didnt win ): ahaha lambert gayboy but after watching the finals (over a rather long dinner :P) ive decided kris is a pretty good guy too. your humble, kinda shy boy next door? awww the part where he won and he kept stammering stuff like 'adam... but adam...' haha.

anyway, my favorites:

QUEEN - WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS (feat. adam lambert + kris allen!!!)

KEITH URBAN - KISS A GIRL (feat. kris!)

what a night :)

2009-05-19T02:35:00.002+08:00

okeh i know it's bad and i really shouldnt be doing this but its 2:36 AM and i just finished watching a series of grey's anatomy season 5 episodes, incl. the grand finale which was like 2 hrs + on youtube and all i can say is "wow". not wow as in yay-happy! but as in... oh. my. gosh. wth? D: i dont know. it's so sad ): i'm not divulging any spoilers here yet, but it's just ): now i can't wait for season 6! except if it's going to be as sad... on the other hand, meredith (before all that happened) has never shown a more brilliant smile :) yep i'm a GA fan to the core

what a blab. haha.

today in connor's class i was falling asleep and i wrote this:

"huck knew that jim was flavouring.

wigman"

don't ask :P

2009-05-15T18:02:00.002+08:00

/edit: a few days on from the last post, and i had to redo the stupid omega long quiz. bcos i took so long *being distracted by other things* that i was signed out of the first session ): and yes, instinct is definitely a winner.

i have no idea what i'm rambling about really. but oh i am glad :) even though this weekend is absolutely crazy, but can't wait for a few things:

tomorrow: lunch w minz at coffee club holland (just like last week, yay), exploration w pet, angels and demons w the mother ;) there's NYAA in the morning, which will def force some discipline into me awrightz.

sunday: should i go back to church? i dont know. not ready yet. and there are other things... ahwell. but i'm improving definitely :) i miss Barker, i miss staring at the stained glass, the huge bouquets at the front, even pastor noel goh's (lame) jokes. and i miss hymnals, the sound of the blessed organ, and worship. ahwell. but well on sunday meeting alena to shop around, then rush for dear lynette's birthday. haven't seen that girl in omega ages!!! like since my birthday?

hmmm. i've actually lost a couple kg from all this sickness, disgusting cough and blocked nose ): snifflez. been buying a lot of food home for malu recently. she thinks it's weird cos its like almost everyday and she's all suspicious and thinks i'm up to no good D:

GRAWR.

should i go for doll domination world tour 4 june? amanda, steph... and jo asked earlier. i dunno? uber tempting :) they were awesome shiz at singfest. but like, yeah. not sure?

there's definitely something wrong w the way im processing things today. i feel all floaty and detached. NO ITS NOT SPACE CADET zomg mr loh is like how mean, and certain people in class hahahhhah

/weekee: KEEKEE! hi lovely hahaha :)

2009-05-12T20:11:00.005+08:00

it is done.

it. the big it.

the really really big it(ch).

of course, it's only stage 1, there's some more to go,

but watch me do this,

i will do it! AHAHA :D

(stupid EE)

oh and,

just watched grey's s5 the epi 22. it was gorgeous :)

izzie and alex were stunning

and merder had their "non-wedding day" in a "churchy church"

the way they'd prefer it, really.

for lack of a better word, a truly awesome episode.

doing the NIE quiz; at the 43% mark now and gaping at a:

"how good are you at writing an essay/article/report of more than ONE page"

- NO SHIT. (HI IB)

"how often do you use facebook"

- now i know why ziyang asked me with that kind of face today. -.- "oh, *never*"

AND A LOT OF QUESTIONS that strongly reminded me about how TOK EE and CAS have moulded and shaped meself over the past almost 1.5 years.

it feels like a long time in IB already... and i've DEFINITELY learnt much, made mistakes and learnt some more. like some wizened old sage w/o the scary head of long white hair. i'm glad for it i guess :)

i think i trust my instinct/emotion more than i do my reasoning (AHAHA TOK)

no, really :)

2009-05-10T23:35:00.003+08:00

wheedle deedle.

just back from much ado about nothing

i'm telling you, it's nothing that's really something,

what with all the... colonial decor, brit-accented locals,

mix of peranakan, chinese, colonial/caucasian cultures all in one

2.5 hour play. and under a starry sky, on a picnic (there was food) mat,

milo + seaweed + laopobing + tarts,

adrian pang has luggage down there

(and he was wearing a very tight stripey swimsuit O.O)

beatrice and benedick bickering their lungs out every few lines together:

this part got the audience snickering like mad:

the part where they both realize they were fooled :P hence the title!

Benedick: Do not you love me?
Beatrice: Why no; no more than reason.
Benedick: Why then your uncle, the Prince and Claudio have been deceived; they swore you did.
Beatrice: Do not you love me?
Benedick: Why no; no more than reason.
Beatrice: Why then my cousin, Margaret and Ursula are much deceived, for they did swear you did.
Benedick: They swore you were almost sick for me.
Beatrice: They swore you were well-nigh dead for me.
Benedick: 'Tis no such matter. Then you do not love me?
Beatrice: No, truly, but in friendly recompense.

...

it was all in all, a great evening. i loved lying back on the mat looking up at the stars during intermission, crunching on a seaweed strip or two :) windy breezes blowing across the fort canning hill: gorgeous! oh and i got the program, and i think the girl playing hero's really pretty haha

and then of course, my phone died (again) and i'm still uncontactable

cos i haven't had the kick to go upstairs and charge it :P

AMANDA I WILL REPLY YOU SOON.

twas the last msg i saw before i pressed "open", read... and then

FLAT. :P *beep*

BACK TO EE!

my flu is killing me - i got all them symptoms now:

cold, runny nose, badbadbadbadbabdabdbad voice, sore throat, cough :/

yest was fever but it's gone. i heck-care and walked arnd everywhere w it

so people, if u find urself getting sick, blame me D: LOL

***

to feli: OKEH AHAHAHA I DID GUESS. "what's this extra jacket + book in my bag?" :} miss you hon! yeah man I CAN DO THIS (EE)vils.

2009-05-09T21:41:00.005+08:00

ARVVVMAMASMFSAAKSFJL

TODAY. THIS.

IS.

THE WEEKEND

THAT I CONQUER

THE WORLD

INFAMOUS

EE.

(Because mrs wong demands my first draft by like Monday night via email, copies to her on Tuesday morning.)

So even though I really wanna spend this long weekend anywhere but on a chair w my mac, it looks like i finally gotta move out of sloth state and get this ASSay done :) 4000 words, think "ONLY 4000 words."

this weekend

i will conquer

EE.

(oh yes)

starting now, enough surfing/watching vids/daydreaming

21:43 HRS

in other news, mer-der finally got married! my fav teevee show; haha i really wish i couldve been out there in the studio at their wedding AWWW but fathopedreams aiya IB ): as in, it was a real ceremony, w a real online wedding registry! uber cool :) anyway, i love them. the proposal was really funny though, watched it on youtube. go find "grey's anatomy season 5 ep 19 the proposal* awww *sniff!

OKEH.

its KICKASS(AY) TIME

/edit: Mother's Day 13:54 PM

and the word count holds at 4424 now oopz! BEAT THAT.

WATCH ME TYPE. :)

Ps: amanda's party was a blast; more abt it another time

***

to the penguin: who's talking about herself? awww but that makes more "person/bird/fats" to heart aite? haha :)

to jet: HAHA funny, i rmb mentioning sth abt bananas in pyjs. karma. yall come t sch in stripeys lah

2009-05-07T19:21:00.002+08:00

murphy's law redefined itself today. "anything that CAN go wrong, WILL go wrong." from the very small, to the very GIB (BIG).

1. slept past my 2.20AM alarm so didnt get up in time to do ekornz IA no. 4. when i DID wake up, it was already time to be OFF for school, so ran around like a mad hatter and got there like 5 min before assembly?

2. read my email today during a 'break' in bio. right there: EE FIRST DRAFT. although my supervisor was really nice and everything she was like okeh dont stress must rest well and all kay (LOL THE IRONY D: haha)

3. intended to do some bio IA/EE stuff today but realized i forgot my major ingredient D: okeh small thing, read seniors' EEs for a bit instead... (and got nagged at by mdm reena for 'disturbing' mrs tay suat kuan's class D: i was just putting stuff down by the side!)

3. and then came the biggest one of them all: I LOST MY MAC. or at least i thought i did. realized so when a) YIP didnt turn up for chem cos of SYF, b) wanted to complete IA 27 and c) thought "WAIT A MINUTE. WHERE'S MY MAC." D: a few calls and sms-es later, i confirmed i'd left it in the SAC under my seat so yep GG to th max... but w the help of samantha, the T-J pair, and a very very lovely janitor, i got it back :) i didnt know whether to laugh or cry, but by then it was BOTH lah hahaha. anyway yeah was superbly grateful for all of them, esp. since at some point i was just standing at the fireAC place blanking out D:

4. The Chock Talk version II. i realize the next couple weeks will be just as nasty, trying and gross as the past two... and counting :/

5. math test - careless careless careless careless. desmond yap threatened conc. camp (FOR MATH SL?!?!) but i swear its cos i didnt bother studying for it D: bio mah LOL

6. i knew something had t b really wrong when nobody was responding t some texts yest (incl. paul cheong abt EE, and sarah - HC dancer friend) sure thing... i suddenly received an influx of 10 msges (this was before Mac incident), and at 4+++ received another influx of 5 D: pissing. then i saw the size of The Inbox. and Sent Items D:D:D: LAWL

7. I WENT TO HOLLAND TO GET ****** SOMETHING BUT. realized i was out of cash. so had to scrimp around in my bag and found a loose $10 note, which was only enough to buy only 1/8th of what i went there for! D:

and for the record, i never fail to meet people in holland. today was a bunch of amanda's friends from acjc, recognized each other. the best was the time i met FIFTEEN IB Y6 in like. 12 minutes

looks like we once had a life after all

tmw will be a brighter day

2009-05-02T23:31:00.002+08:00

omg i'm in such a major sloth state i don't feel like doing anything at all and i'm wasting my time doing the slack ultimate hahahahaha i'm not even surfing or watching youtube or whatever. knew i should have watched wolverine today. darnnit :/ ahwell when school opens, see who else wants to watch besides the four we have now :)

off to shower! i am such

pig

today. can't deny it D:

funny quotable quotes of the week:

x: eh why can't the latin american countries develop swine flu or something!

y: why?

x: then like we can skip our IB exams!

y: what has that gotta do with anything?

x: because IB HQ in LATIN AMERICA what!

nearly died laughing at that one :P

and then there was the Person Jt one (shan't say out of respect for the person's privacy but... well Joppa people will know this)

i shall relief myself from explaining what happened prior to this snippet :)

me: EH haha amanda's pouch. *rattles bag of invitation cards* no it's not tampons

x: why on earth would amanda want to carry ice axes in that bag! they wouldnt fit anyway!

me: ?!?!?!?! what has that gotta do w anything

x: DUH tampons are ice axes used to climb mountains right?!

at this point, i believe jiarong jialong beu and a few others around us all turned and ... stared. HAHA our class teh owningz

...

and i still dno what to do w my life even though i have a million assignments to do

i want to go out again hahaha

2009-04-26T22:53:00.002+08:00

just so that each of us can retain some bit of nostalgia

amidst this mess of IB work

and remember our childhood days

here's the trailer for harry potter no. 6

EMBED DISABLED SO CLICK HERE :)

notice the music at the end is now a LOT moodier

darker pessimistic D:

not us, though! keep your heads up people

week toughnut six will 'soon' be over!

2009-04-21T21:17:00.003+08:00

Sometimes, if you want a fresh perspective, people do give it to you, in VERY VERY simple terms, but simultaneously loaded statements:

/time check: 21:17 HRS (started at 1630 HRS but w a pretty lengthy siesta in between)

me: *to the house at large* I HATE TEA OH KAY. IT'S THE BANE OF MY LIFE.

*munches on Swedish meatballs and thinks about honey yoghurt in fridge in front of me :D HAHA*

Please note that I haven't gone mental although I THINK I could, very soon:

'The FundaMENTALs of Philosophy' (a new book I borrowed from Shaw Lib @ sch yest)

There were living breathing beings less than 20m away from me, therefore I haven't progressed to the stage of having a conversation w yourself - i.e. a true blue (ocean) IB student indeed :)

me: I REALLY REALLY HATE TEA OH KAY.

malu: *alarmed* why, what are you doing?

me: an essay *glares (at mac)*

malu: what's the topic? tell me tell me maybe i can help

me: *evil grin* "we see things not as they are but as we are" like, questioning our perspective against absolute truth...

malu: *stares for a few seconds* well. that's very... DEEP.

HEH she makes me laugh, really. :D D: :O

RAHHHHHH. Still not blogging abt ROD yet; or the absolutely cute kid I met @ ChenSuLan yest AHAHAH LOVES :D we spent the evening drawing spastic mushrooms!

My eyes were reacting spontaneously (to the vapours) in the Organic Chem Lab today D: 'twas becoming a rabbit and switched out of glasses/lens interchangeably the whole day cos of the IRRITATION. yarg!

mr yip: JAYNE. go home and wash out your lens container, soak your lenses immediately pls, and change your saline solution

me: ?!??!?! OH-KAYYYY

2009-04-18T23:15:00.002+08:00

I found a blog: THIS IS ABOUT BEE BEE.

Okay so it's about 12th in general. But it was still last year at Barker for OUR enrolment; one year on, we're the big dudes and we've got new little ones and it's THEIR enrolment and OUR passing out, our Relief Of Duty (aka ARE-OH-DEE) D:

Therefore, today I don't know whether to be happy sad finicky funny melancholy emo or hyperzixocixvzoomzzvom BUT WELLLL. today was a good day, to put it very very simply. even including the fact that my (and feli's) gingerbread mushrooms were interpreted as phallic symbols! O.O more another day about today, but for now, i can sure as lovely safely say that HELLO BOYS AND GIRLS OF THE TWELFTH (EYE). LUBCHUZZXZZ VERY MUCHLY i'll carry these memories all the way down the way they do in CATS :D

xoxo

YES EVEN WHEN THEY ARE CAPABLE OF DOING SUCH POTENTIALLY LIFE THREATENING THINGS TO EACH OTHER :D

2009-04-13T20:52:00.005+08:00

Easter easter easter! :) excellent one just past; what with all the chocolate cadbury Creme Easter Eggs at home, a comfortably rousing service on Sunday 830 w organs + aged hymnals + (er...) Fanny Tan's recognizably fluffy hairdo, chitchat w Kim's parents and brothers (HAHA KIM YOU HAVE CUTE (YOUNGER) BROTHERS :D), second brekkie (don't ask) at Garden Halia @ Botanics - think cinnamon french toast and poached eggs :P. knocked out after and arose at 3 to go Ikea for first time in ages. SWEDISH MEATBALLS, chalks (for Zhuoey's card :D) and stamp markers LOL :)

All in all, a gorgeously IB-unproductive, but life's-little-pleasures productive weekend :D and Pastor Malcolm Tan gave a rather memorable preaching up there... Of course his message was the conventional "Christ has died... has risen... Christ will come again" ;) But I think the main takeaway I had was a reminder of how we have this hope in Christ that will see us through just about anything really; and especially if we have the true-heart to pray for it. For us it's IB and everything yeah, but it's also this hope that'll push us through each day and all it's little trials and tribulations, joys and excitements. So yeah, know what will help us start each day all refreshed and renewed, and goaded through the 24 hours... and the year ahead, even? :P

*ding!*

A lot has went on in the past months I'd say, lots more in a year than the whole life of mine put together... there were quite a few 'false starts' back in the last couple of months; weasley little attempts to get back on track w God. But I make and made and am making meself a promise this Easter season, and I really wanna do this well, this time :) Glad to serve for possibly the final time w the worship team for ROD. YAY sleepover in school this Friday w Sam and Feli! :) (will ignore the PEOPLE next door ahahaha - we want GIRL TIME post rehearsal)

So an old friend says: Old things in earlier months still rub raw memories/wounds sometimes; but one also learns to forgive and forget over time. Now all that's left is to make away w inhibitions (fear, skepticism, whatnot) *blink blink?*

AHWELL.

Oh today went back to school in specs, possibly the first time in 9 years... excluding WoW when my lenses started "PMSing" and I had to borrow Sharry's for like 5 days straight I think? (ALSO RED TINTED FRAMES AHAHA!) Anyway, really amusing responses:

"EH... what the. ... *tilts head* oooo RED" (not mervyn)

" Jayne! You look like an octopus!" (hint, a girl's name starting w B and ending in -eulah :P)

"Oh my sexy!" (disclaimer: Petrinaaaaa lol)

"...four eyed monster" (*glares* hahaha "he's dead next time i see him")

"I SEE A TARD standing in front of me!!" (D.I.T. and Jet are equally turdy tards)

"AHHH VIRUS!!!" (STUPID YANDONG)

"william got thick framed specs too! LOOK!" (6.5 people; william gives a WTH look HAHA and so do i)

"ahh... red ah? black nicer eh. wait. why?" (balls is forgiven cos i whacked his head w a door ACCIDENTALLY today D: oopz)

"wah. new retro look ah jayne." (Paul Cheong, distracted from the fact that once again, yours truly was late for class)

"trying to look like a studious professor is it? well done for SQA attempt! BLUE OCEAN." (Loh Kum Leong the Cee Tee)

"eh NS girl?" (typical Papa Lurbee)

... mostly the "WHAT THE-s?" and the whys, and wherefores :P

Funny things... laughter really is the best medicine :) On a sidenote, WON'T be wearing specs to school again in a while, except for days I really need to start cleaning my lenses before I get an infection. YES ALL THIS STEMMED FROM NASTY DIRTY LENSES.

i was happily drinking fresh coconut juice (yes, straight from the coconut) after dinner a short while ago. decided to check up on its nutritious values:

*types in coconut juice under Google*

95.5% water, no fat, LOW calories.

can be used as a replacement for medical saline (IV fluid) in 3rd world countries

...

"wow malu, give me more of this stuff everyday i like it ahaha"

and so all was good and glorious until -

COCONUT JUICE IS NATURAL VIAGRA

!!!! *no comment, absolutely whatsoever*

light reading!

au revoir :)

2009-04-10T13:54:00.004+08:00

TOK OP OVER

"hysterica passio"

- Lear (were you listening in english? :P)

change of examiners last min - wongtzy, OLSON, tuckyz ):

glasses + CATS ticket collection later

sec 4 class gathering near paragon/cheronne's place

this piggy overslept 8.30 GF service; going for Easter service instead

black font is way easier to read :)

change is good; barack obama liked change, he made that pretty much clear

and so change has come to cd-j.blogspot

whee/heehee

i have a handful more photos to edit!!! D:

me in glasses: HAHA not the teeth (i hope)

2009-04-08T20:14:00.004+08:00

less than 20 hours to the tee oh kay. and then it'll be the end (or nearly) of 1.33 years of philosophy, thinking and thinking but getting back to square 1 anyway, watching random movies (sometimes scary) in lectures, having "heated" arguments in class (yeah right) :D

WAHHHHH!! i Scared ):

TOP REASON TO OWN TOK #1: COS WE CAN ENJOY TOK FREE PERIODS FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR. BEAT THAT. okay except TOK essay consultation :/ but not like taylor doesnt let us run around everywhere (including catching fish from the pond w one's bare hands) during lessons anyway :) BEAT THAT (AGAIN)

ahahahaha back to OP practice now :) on a lighter note, i'm getting a new pair of glasses next week! hmmm and MIGHT wear to school, but everytime i wear glasses i get laughed at. pre-warning: DON'T EVEN THINK about it. i'll get Caveman to beat you into pulp (okay jkjk)

-jet: just skiing is enough to kill me, thanks :)

2009-03-27T22:27:00.003+08:00

heehee i find it quite funny that imma moving off to kuala lumpur in about 16 hours' time for a family friend's wedding party and coming back in like 20 hours after that on sunday evening :) so it'll be something like CCA - NUH probably not an option awww well D: - airport (no shopping!) - hope i survive the 2-way flight - wedding dinner - TOK + EE + IA + P*** - sleep - more IB - minimal movement around KL - SEENGAHPOUR :D

i wanna go jet skiing and horse-riding in the afternoon! there's a riding track nearby!!! it's been 7 years since i last rode a horse i think his name was slinky or shiny or sth like that. not stinky! :P he's the huge white stallion off whose back i got thrown AHAHA back then but i was LIGHTER, you see ;)

2009-03-23T23:46:00.004+08:00

while many other parts of this life of mine are great, something else feels very nastily wrong and for some reason, i feel it the most today. feels wrong enough for me to feel the need to just stop and drop everything for a few moments and take a breath, step back, and gain perspective. problem is, can't seem to find that time. (or maybe too many late nights have made me slightly crabby)

after looking back at my old dreams, after hearing stuff/opinions from those i value most, sometimes, i don't know if what i want the most, is really what i want at all

:/ cmon i'm telling myself this is just a phase. i don't like feeling grumpy, even if i can't help it

2009-03-21T05:42:00.002+08:00

4105 words to my EE

1124+ to my math port (but more importantly, a few more graphs to go)

and i've successfully stayed up almost 24 hours straight without sleep. which is amazing considering that shopping whirlwind gig around town today :) borrowed mom's card and she went "be careful what you spend on" over the phone so yep i kept budget down. but all that food! gelato+pizza+minestrone soup+chippy's mars bar+milkshakes :/ no exercise today and an overdue twilight video in my bag rawr

cheers to felicia who's been staying up with me for the past 5 hours since i got home LUBCHUZZZ :D (and laughed at me for taking a comfy 1 hr shower at 3+ am) fun to have besties to stay awake with manzzxz. well now the sun is rising and i'm saying

HELLO NEW DAY.

i hope you'll be nice :)

2009-03-18T20:06:00.004+08:00

/edit

~~2457~~ 3306

WORDS TO MY NAME.

in the form of EE.

even if i killed all my weevils on accident and am tearing my hair out on that one :/

seldom we get such pretty days as this, or maybe just cos we don't notice cos all of us are always so busy :/ but anyhowdies, i woke at 9 today to an electric blue sky - the trees seemed greener, sunlight more golden, birds chirping like crazy... AHAHA okay that sounded really dreamy but yeah it's true! and i really enjoyed walking up and down the hill 4 times today! yes, FOUR! :D first, was down to bus stop to go to school. second, walk alena up. third, walk her down to gastro where we had mascarpone gelato! :) fourth, back up, with king lear in hand looking like a nerd HEEHEE

and yes, it takes 3 buses to go to school!! :/ 48 took me to holland village (2 magazines + 1 caramel ice blended), and yep had a gorgeous sunny morning walk around and to the bus stop. took 95 to opp acjc, and 74 to dover (ACS) bus stop! took SUCH a long while and by then had to run to reena's, grab my stuff, and zip out again to fly back to meet alena :) but anyhow, today was awesome, what with catching up over a massive carbo/fat lunch in mad jack's, gelato at swirl, and LOADS of snacks at home while watching HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN 10 DAYS :D i miss us talking, and well she's one of the few i do try to keep in touch with at least *kekeke* although of course, sometimes i wonder what if SHE came over to AC or I stayed behind in hwachie? hmmm...

but anyway! my point is. today was a beautiful, cloudless blue day, and walking through the park afterwards back home was gorgeous. if not for the cold milk and groceries, i'da stayed on a park bench next to the swan lake and read Lear and watch sunset or something HEH :D

past 2 days were equally wonderful, being able to chill out w great company and all :) monday was an entirety of bong and pet. and another HUGE feast w food from gastro and snacks at home, lots of PUNCH :D tuesday was on a rooftop and that really felt like on top of the world literally... i watched the clouds shifting shapes in the sky, forming and dissolving into the blueness! catching up a little; off for one of my favourite snacks, frolick scoop! :) mango and waffle crackers, mmmm

conclusion: i'm one motha sentimental prat.

2009-03-15T19:06:00.002+08:00

well then, it's the end. this is it, our last day [yesterday] plenty of good memories, days that we'll never ever forget, memories of our times together as youths. but yup, this is the last of it (at least for now i think) and it's strange to be so morose about it but it really provided the best of times, of memories, of relationship-bondings in many ways, amidst the IB storms

anyhows, yesterday was the last of camp, and the night before was all... "nah let's just stay this way" but AHWELL it was the best ever camp i've ever had along w LDC 08, and though the ending sombred us up quite a fair bit after all the high's, i frankly have to appreciate it alot because now i've found some footing QT-wise again :)

mostly about how i didnt feel worth enough/couldnt bring myself to sit there w the ppl i've worked most closely with and pray for th Y5s just yet bc my own QT life's been below zero for the most part this year (yes being honest there) and the "come sit down" looks on their faces was a little much, personally... just made me feel really guilty and all. so i went out w BaaBaa (my SHEEP pillow's initials are BB!) and tried to pray properly for the first time in ages. still felt wonked and didnt wanna go back up to Primers Room until they were done. but two or three good chats later about life and the Y5s later, i realized a few things ;) and i'm glad for it yeah

sidenote: mom ignored my calls until almost 8plus! ): heh but yeah anyway what this camp gave me: live footsie, talking to the y5s during their worship prac, getting to know those gorgeous y5 girls (quite "on", and really cute/funny), random chats and catching up w diff ppl, showers at wee hours of the night, BEST HORLICKS EVER :D, catching up w our y7s, 3 hours of intensive running around - touch rug, jogs arnd school, gym-my stuff later, roaming school at 3am, getting half-hour of sleep (too cold, no sleeping bag), getting bitten by mozzies until 5.30 when i gave up and got up, buying 80 packs of nasi lemak (20 of which were redundant!!!!), more time w Y5s, SUPERLOTSOF PRECIOUS TIME @ the west coast jetty w Pet having great girl chats (we went a little crazy), scarped my foot a little (!) on the rocks, reading King Lear under a bridge, cute dogs, the last hour together... LOVE :)))

sidenote #2: feli and i found half-clothed squash guys in our girls toilet. i dunno who was more disturbed? and for most part of 2nd day, the back of my skull was throbbing like crazy from the full-speed-on shoulder-head collision during touch ): i swear my brain shifted hahahaha. oh yes, and weird moment where Pet laughed at the sight of me sitting next to "F*** off" written under the bridge, and when the guys saw it later... and someone's "there's a troll under the bridge!" GROSS who was it SO MEAN ):

ahwell uni fair today saw so many people from IB... and now pet and i are making our future plans AHAHAHAHA :D alsuwaigh and lewina are in the Prospectus! omgoodness D:

current favourite song: broken strings by james morrison :) bittersweet lyrics, great song

2009-03-10T23:49:00.003+08:00

i wonder if no blogposts = no life. because somehow it means that when i'm on my mac at home, i am making myself less distracted = more typing and reading out a 1/8th revamped EE draft, for example = accomplish more IB work in one night though each day lengthens it by proportionally more anyway = smile, sigh, bed = wake up, next day, same cycle = NO LIFE. where are you, i want you back! ):

which, of course, maketh all that i typed out there an irony in real time. there, i'm talking in econs HL terms now! :D UGH. ah well, careers day tomorrow, that's a break off looking at inflation, a mass of words on a mass of Paul Cheong's slides, integration (still need to copy stuff off Feli), delocalization of electrons, etc. i want to "delocalize" now and try studying in canadian international or global indian international AHAHAHA okay kidding i love school

actually, yeah i'm not kidding man, i really sort of do. not the studying and classes but the people and all, the stuff we all do (and/or survive together) that we'll remember - some yes, some no, some to be in the many years down the road :) like today was really quite funny and i came home quite shacked after:

#1 stealing karlo's backpack as a joint plan and watching the poor pinoy running up and down the block yelling "where's my bag AHHH" then he suddenly saw me with it and charged down the corridor. at which i balked and feli screamed at me to go into the girls' toilet so i scuttled in quickly and guess what that pervert of a pinoy charges INTO the GIRLS toilet and i freak and throw his backpack back at him. he comes out and suddenly people in the corridor look at him and the door he just closed and say: "KARLO DID YOU JUST COME OUT OF THE GIRLS TOILET." and i'm behind laughing my a** off ;)

#2 ben had lighter fuel and was going trigger happy spraying it at people, and i got quite a fair bit too until i got "pissed off" and wanted to use my scented spray as a weapon AHAHAHA which would have been "mass destruction" because i suddenly realized (or we all did, at the same time) that if he sprayed lighter oil/fuel, and i sprayed alcoholic scents... NO SHIZ MASS DESTRUCTION and we'd all be little bits of pieces and flobber on the IB Level 5 lift landing :D

lalalala and of course the biggest and best of all #3 FELICIA TAN'S HAIRPEE EIGHTEEN BEEDAY. good gollywogs, half my friends are already eighteen! D: well she says the only reasn she's still in this school is that she needs to "wait for all you younger (immature, i'm sure :P) people to grow up and reach" her age AHAHAHA :D anyway, i'm quite happy living my last year as a kid now, because the amt of rubbish i do in school everyday... i'm gonna get 24194892018 demerit points-equivalent in a corporate, working environment BLAH :D

at the UK universities place this past weekend, i remembered how 5 years ago, i'd think WHAT THE H**L this is still WAYYYY FARRR away from where i am now so heck it seriously, but look at where we are now. i told kristin and tim seet who were there too, and amanda, and yeah i guess we all feel the same way! and i'd like to think oh gosh how cool would it be if all of us girlfriends got into the same uni or same country and yeah we could all meet at an alfresco cafe one day and do work together sipping hot tea and eating scones :P or share a dorm/rent an apartment near West End HAHAHA OKAY the dream... the daydreaming stops

here.

and you wake up, crash and burn and realize no no no time to wake up man i think i should just focus on trying to get into local medicine for now :) i know dreaming about the awesome programs at King's (patient interaction in your first semester!!!) and UCL (preparatory intercalation for BSc and MBBS in your third year) is all well and wonderful - BUT half a million dollars? D: unless i get a scholarship, which is REALLY DIFFICULT i dont know ): really, 70000 pounds versus 70000 sing D here in NUS? you do the math

and

i say:

"if not medicine in NUS, i have 2 other career options:

1. Road-sweeper for Dover Road and Buona Vista

2. Vineyard worker in Sardinia, Italy (plucking grapes and eating them along the way)"

/edited 3:27 AM

1934 WORDS OF XTENDED ESSAY

BEMUSED SMILE

TIRED LOOK

BLACK EYES (HEEHEE NO PUN INTENDED)

AND A SCREENSHOT ABOUT EYE-BEE! :D

okay careers day zombified max! xx

2009-03-01T19:56:00.003+08:00

1493 WORDS.

ALL YOU EVER WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT

WEEVILS.

see, even my topic has EE in it. in addition to the word EVIL, and the greater evil: EVILS. ladidum LOL i'd hug myself but that's just retarded, so. accomplishment, friend. although i've spent most of today pretty stoned out after getting back from founders' service in ACS, as an USHER

so yeah, today was a flurry of physical stuff. up at 5.45 and out in thompson/macritchie/HSBC treetops by 630. warm up, jump around like a frog, take photos w the others, then off on a 6++ km sprint/run/jog!! :D felt so good and cooling, although it was a pretty squashed up slightly muddy jungle path where early morning dew was dripping off tree leaves above :/ and lots of other sweaty people heaving past so er yeah

out at 8 and back home to wash up and prep for usher duty AHAHA jeans and blue BB top! was running late and had to towel dry my hair furiously in car. GOSH and arrived with it flying everywhere, karlo actually called me a GOTH. it now takes 20min to blow-dry!! instead of like 5 min last time ohmygee ): waste electricity, waste $$ in recession AHAHA and add weight on top of it *cues weeping after height and weight* :P

collected $$ for offering, took photos w the BB ppl, shouting and running around doing crazy stuff, playing w juniors and all the little babies and kiddies! :) sir jon ng's son JULIAN came as well so all the others were going gaga as well LOL. and like how jon ng put julian on the line yest on his mobile, cause jul wanted chocolate but jon ng said no and we each had to explain to jul that NO ITS BAD FOR YOU. but i told him it'd make him happy until he ate too much of it. jon ng tried to punch me HAHA

and then in other things, for the first time in 8 years, no missions ): a day before departure, we find out that well, things didnt go too well between the hindis and tamil tigers, so the govt shot down planes near the intl airport and all, and colombo was rendered unsafe for travel. prayed for those who had already landed in sri lanka, and so far, they're trying to get back still :/

life in essence, very sweet then very odorous essences

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ACS.

YOU'RE AN OLD OLD BOY NOW, ONE TWO THREE YEARS OLD. OH MY. HURHUR D:

2009-02-22T21:33:00.002+08:00

it's been a year plus since we danced around on a cold wintry Christmas Day in the middle of Hungary, in a significantly warmer, fireplace-lit restaurant serving up hot bagels and sausages, and some warming red wine. since we came up w a Christmas carol of our own, specialized to that group of cheery teenagers we were, to the general lyrics of Twelve Days of Christmas :) since we danced pranced and took photos, with an equally enthusiastic Dancing Hungarian Waiter

one year on, and i wonder if that kind of joy is replicated in finishing EE TOK IA (x100000) WL IOC and all that IB ever proffers? but all i know is finishing up the last bio topic (immunity) before The Test tmrw is some kind of happiness enough :) silly way to measure happiness, but then...

this is the 221st post since the birth of this blog those many days ago! maybe i'll change its skin in march? HMM. lubchu, world (skool)!

2009-02-20T18:44:00.002+08:00

in recent days, i have extracted four types of spices and found out that my nose actually really likes black peppercorn - except my tongue doesn't... at all. darnnit haha :) also discovered how to make dry protein powder from very very wet soybeans. came up w a hot family favorite dessert: the vee day krispie slices that pet and i made, and noww the recipe's been reinvented three times over! :D

EE is a process, a **mn bla**ee tiring process that's almost **rn well over YAYERZ :) apparently im not the only one who's happy. so is reena AHAHAHA she actually did a victory dance thing when i told her i was almost done and was giggling (?!?!) away! and said when i finish and clear out of her lab, she's gonna go buy TOTO and she's sure she'll strike it big and omgosh that's such a sad and very bad thing to say but its funny too LOL!

lalalalalalaaaaaaa saw planetshakerz in old audi today so cool LOVE.

lebbz thinks the big grinny SUPRE-TOOTHY smiley face (some msn emoticon) strongly strongly reminds him of me which was really rather amusing and somehow quite a nice thing to hear yesterday, in a strange sense :) EHEHE because i am strongly resolved that this year should be my best year in school, so why not go around being happy and jolly! AND HAPPINESS IS CONTAGIOUS. so smile, people, and remember IB can't get nobody down yeah

i think IB makes you grow mouldy though! :D

2009-02-16T21:33:00.004+08:00

gawd.

i came home happily after school, sat down in the kitchen (or plopped down in a blue, white and black mass) malu saunters along and asks me to try her new dish - it's some mass of white meat that resembles chicken. and she claims that it is CHICKEN. so i ask for 3 more pieces and woffle the stuff down :)

. . .

then she comes over, sits down and -

malu: how is it?

me: great, great... is this for dinner? i want some more :)

malu: okay! *gets some more*

me: *eats some* are you sure this is chicken?

malu: yaaaa what else can it be??

by this time, i can sure as HECK tell its not the poor little bird i've been feeding on for most of my life. and my suspicions are growing way faster than my appetite is. so i ask again, she says no its chicken. i furrow my brows and say that i'm not talking to her again if i find out its not chicken.

and so she revealed it to me -

the LEGS of that THING.

NEARLY DIED. I HAVE A STRICT SELF POLICY AGAINST EATING EXOTIC OR NEAR-EXOTIC ANIMALS. and i almost went bulimic and wanted to get the stuff out of my system. i'm sorry, i REALLY don't like anything that can hop around - be it, grasshoppers, RABBITS (how can you eat something you've reared as a PET??!? D:) and most of all, the Croak-Croak!!!

i'm never trusting any food on my plate until i know for sure what it is...

i won't make a very good guinea pig for escargot, urchins, horse/rabbit meat, esoteric China dishes, FRIED INSECTS (!)

basically, i'm no inquisitive anything-i-will-eat little kid. or Irish ten-year-old boy ;)

2009-02-10T22:44:00.003+08:00

today during bio lab session -

baey yg: eh jayne you scare me you know... like there's so much work to do but somehow you always manage to look so carefree

to put this in context, i'd been charging around like a mad cow trying to get my potatoes in cold water before the browning reaction had the chance to kick ass (much to paul cheong's amusement... and rena's irritation). SO:

me: !?!??!?!?! *incredulous look peels across face*

by the way, rena completely adores me, up to the point that last week she went:

"jayne chiang the day you finish EE, i very happy. you make me slog my guts out to earn every single cent of my salary!!!"

oops.

and looking at my homework list now, thinking back to that thing abt today:

- EE RESEARCH (exploring new scopes to do Discussion)

- KING LEAR (extract 12 - and track down my absent IOC partner)

- BIO IA 23 and 24 PLUS REDO IA 20 (academic honesty, COUGH)

- TOK DRAFT TWO (!)

- TOK OP TOPIC (!!)

- CORRECTIONS FOR COMMENTARY, CHEM QUIZZES, MATH TEST

(by the way, math was a disaster since i studied zero, and chem was... BAD. like kim + ben + my marks couldn't even reach full score. how disgusting is that :/ yuckz)

- WORLD LIT ESSAY DRAFT 1

- STARDEE FOR BIO + CHEM TESTS (WK 8), ECONS + ENG STRAND 2 (WK 7)

for the first time in my 2 years, and possibly in my 12 years as a student in uniform, in this sunny little happy island,

FEEL

SUPER

STRESSED.

AGH. i want a hug ):

2009-02-08T19:57:00.004+08:00

it always used to be me either being the youngest among the teens at a party/dinner, or somewhere in the middle. become 17/18 suddenly and you're considered amongst the old, or the very old, the ancient teens now. i feel it... here's how.

final CNY dinner of the year yesterday (i'd sincerely hope so, since i'm not controlling my diet at home either) :D so no Inkheart ): completely forgot about it till one hour before when aunty rachael rang us up! gee. anyway - every other teen there was younger, so most of the night was a "second NUH":

talking abt IB and how everyone should dunk education altogether, to the sec2s who were hopelessly eager to get into JC quickly (!!), listening to a sec1 complain about how "BOYS ARE STUPID AND A REDUNDANT OBJECT." (she's a girl of course. LOL) and how she'd "rather be in where i am now (cedar girls') than a mixed school like in primary sch (rosyth)" hah i took the liberty to remind her she'd think otherwise in abt 3-4 years' time, at most

realized much later on that lemuel and his mom were at the party too! that's where i suddenly felt like a kid again, cos this time it was me listening to him wax on about university graduation, how getting finance degrees sucked during the recession now, and "private banking in 5 years time". GOSH :/ and then of course, how the cruise in dec suddenly felt like AGES ago? all the late nights w us 8 girls lounging around and the... random extra (pimp). HAHA good times

there was a spider in the car yest on the way to aunty r's. BLAIRDEE HAYL the thing was on the DASHBOARD i was okay at first cos it was on mom's side. it was a baby - but at least 6 cm across nevertheless, legs included of course :/ ANYWAY. then it began crawling over to my side... and next to me on the passenger window!!!!!! so for the first time in my life i experienced the 'paralyzed by fear' sensation: like i just started screaming and shrieking but completely couldn't move. twas only when mom pulled up by the kerb, that i began scrambling onto the driver's seat and she went round to my side, opened the door and knocked the little critter off.

overly-dramatic to the normal person, maybe. but real... i think mom really wants to send me for psychiatric treatment to get rid of my spidey phobia, heh. anyways i swear its spidey breeding season and i'm getting neurotic abt wherever i move in the house! O.O heck, i wasnt convinced it was out of the car yest, and tried to get this 9-yr-old kid at the party to find it for me and kill it. cos he went: "ahhh, so big? SO FUN! i want!" OH MY GOSH. little boys...

in an annoying yet relieving way, good things happen right after i start venting. that however, does not mean i will vent annoyance sooner. venting annoys me, in itself... complexities of character/personality i shan't bother to explain lol :) at least im more or less forgiven for now, in as much as i can infer

i miss going to barker ):

2009-02-04T23:24:00.003+08:00

and so, you're pissed, and i know "sorry" probably doesn't cut it an inch right now... neither will "there were mistakes i made... many. but i wish i could turn back time (i know i can't)". but one day in the near future we'll sort all this out, i hope :/

just chanced upon an old correspondence... a really really old one.

you never know how much you're missing a dear friend do you?

until you stop denying it yourself. pooey

in a strange way, the song feli and i've been mercilessly hopelessly stuck on for a few days' running now:

"Leave Out All The Rest"

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

i really do miss us talking ):

2009-02-02T23:10:00.003+08:00

break from EE/IA research! what a long day. at least nat mari and i could pon chapel (okay i feel bad but my head was going to bust anyway) and sleep outside while waiting to sell them !nk papers (and that came out yielding a pretty awesome $$ crop! :D)

the weeks promise to draggggg. although that number in my diary is ever dwindling and its kind of scary how its moving seemingly so fast? two seven five today! oh no

ah well, last of the CNY celebrations yesterday, at uncle richard fan's. turns out his nephew's adwyn chong so yep, the classic O.O, pause, and ... "hello!" and am still vaguely amused at the k story abt kenrick and i? ze moms were telling us how we were supposed to be born within the same week but i came out wayyyy earlier than feb so now he's the significantly younger one AHAHAH its like pseudo-(failed)-twin. bit mortifying to have us know after 17 years? and ken was like the first Y5 i saw today! ooer. i've convinced him to take my subject combo ;)

k's mom: hey jayne last time i saw you, it was in utero!! (-.-)

and then there was the classic sec 1 RI boy, fresh out of pri school and absolutely girl-phobic. "i will never, EVER have a girlfriend! i don't like girls, so fussy, so talkative, always need so much attention, presents, and if you ignore them, you GG already..." O.O I SWEAR. of course we girls defended ourselves and went: "trust us, you won't be saying this 4 years down the road."

best part was when he said: "don't need girls la, so troublesome. i'd rather have a dog!" all in good humor, nobody took offence at that, of course :P and he kept spewing out random trivia, the kind that the typical bookwormish pri sch kid would know. "china's last emperor ended his days as a soup hawker!" ... ?!?!?!?! geemeenee

pygie on sat was owning, and so was supper at B&J's after that. hadn't spoken to aunty pat for ages, really sort of missed chatting w her :)

fat fat fat!!!! pon math class, do EE. went for cold-rock and coffee bean w nat, ATE CARAMEL MUD CAKE flavor plus COOKIE DOUGH and FUDGE toppings. went to giant to buy EE materials half an hour ago, and picked up PULUT HITAM and TEH TARIK ice cream on the way back. NIAN GAO, YAM CAKE and PANADERIA CHEESECAKE for breakfast tomorrow.

CRAP. when is height and weight? i need to find a way to bamboozle tim ng out of it...

2009-01-29T20:49:00.004+08:00

this week has been one filled with...

SPIDERS.

i'd have put one up here for show, but no because i sympathise. those things around my place are like slightly more than a palm-width across (that's including their disgustingly spindly legs la of course :P) so anyway. 3 sightings (hadn't seen one for gazillion years) in 2 days this past weekend was least t say, AWFUL.

first one was in my bathroom. i screamed blue murder (have i said this before?) and lopped gel and chemicals all over the poor thing, cos nobody was at home. shrieked a little along the way while trying to boil it in hot water from the showerhead :/ it was moving, dam**t

second one was er, well. in the washroom downstairs. after coming back from no. 27's party, tiff used it and came out going "THERE'S A SPIDER IN THE LOO!" she meant the bowl. so there was thing scrambling around inside (too slippery) and it was the SOLID black kind of spider. the kind that doesnt look like a gd hard whack w a newspaper does the trick :/ and malu and i stared at tiff a while before realizing: "tiffany, WAS IT IN THERE WHEN YOU USED THE TOILET."

apparently it was O.O she was amazingly calm, a level i would never have reached were i in the same position. dude, i'd have screamed the sh** out of the whole neighborhood, i'm tt neurotic abt arachnids. anyway we told her mom and she said: "is the spider okay?" -.- think tiff was more worried if the spider had bitten her...

well. third one was an hour after no. 2!! it fought w a HUGE lizard (20 CM!) and lost 2 legs :/ they were on the wall so us kids and the mothers were watching wide-eyed. then i told malu to end its life, cant stand those vermin. seriously!

GAHHHH. and HAHA told malu, helper services (in a not mean way) are like some relationships? first week: they ask your every want/need/desire and do more than you'd like them to ;) six years down the road: they don't look at you when you come into the room/go "mmm okay." nonchalantly when you ask them sthg. LOL :P

and so, the week has been otherwise... brilliant :) CNY celebrations; library visits (meeting loads of IB people); last lib visit w natalie and we laid out on the floor in this open-air space near the study lounge. it was so awesome until we got chased away cos they needed to setup for a function ): ahwell! haha. and shopping w nat before tt in the morning, bought a few things... shopped for books, make-up, heels (hers), clothes, Juicy Couture (!!! :D). together, i mean. or we'd be broke :/

of course, the most "EGG-CITE" thing of this week's school-time (2 days!): class prayer meetings. we had the first one today, 8 of us in the 'stuffy room' (lovingly coined by izzy)... had worship, prayer and sharing about our busy little lives. our class has 23 people and today was our first meeting, so that was pretty brilliant, actually :) we're hoping it'll pick up eventually, and well. for God to just continue reaching out to touch us, one by one :D amazing, being in there, really.

so yup, it was beu izzy and tim seet who started the whole thing :) kudos, guys! and then bong mari brian me... paul who poked his nose in since his twin bro was there anyway, and prob will chill around for next group prayers too! and crawshaw, who prayed out loud - first time i've ever heard him and glad of it... we're really gunning for this to spread to all classes, tt each class will start their own movement of sorts. so all the way people! :D

class wrote valentine's day notes for each other today it was so fun and cute ;) we'll get to see our envelopes on the day itself... or fri the 13th, rather. LOL

i'm so glad they didn't take height and weight today! considering i'm eating some chicken in lemongrass sauce now, rice, veg and yam-cake... i don't wanna take next week either!!

i love life. very circusy... and gamey ol' fun :)

2009-01-26T19:22:00.004+08:00

stuff begins to feel right again

when you own up to yourself

recognize that it took months to gain a clearer perspective

then realize how damaging your actions could be to another

don't know when it really began?

time to make amends

2 years 2 months running, now

just can't do it to a friend who's been by your side/

watching over from afar

however discreetly, for all that time

---

'Hello', by lionel richie. aka. he who adopted nicole richie :P

gorgeoussssssss (music) at a charity concert in london

and no, it had nothing to do w prince harry & william in the audience

nyahahaha

---

$$$ coming a'knocking,

awesome reunion dinner last night (:

uncle Dom took the crap out of my ribs, laughing

only thing worrying, grandmama's not as strong as before :/

stayed up till 7.30AM last... night/this morning

reading mom's CNY present: a novel -

things i want my daughters to know by elizabeth noble,

its rather fun and addictive :)

2009-01-25T16:41:00.004+08:00

mrs angeline wong just messaged me with:

"Jayne pls see me with first [EE] draft on Thurs. Mrs Wong. Thanks."

!!! MUTED HORRORSSSSS. FIRST BLOOD.

considering giving her an ang pow with two little chocolate ingots and telling her in a very sweet voice that i've no results yet...

in other things, a truly marvelous QT for the first time in ages, and i'm very much thankful for Him righting my attitude, which is as much as i can help the situation? it's definitely improved by a wee bit at least... anyway it has to. CNY reunion dinner in 2 hours!!! (i got no new clothes this year, WTP LA)

felicia just made me realize i have up to 12 nov before it's all over for me :D the end of IB, the end of school w/ uniforms, the end the end the end

2009-01-24T20:52:00.002+08:00

i don't really know how to spell it out. but i really don't like how stuff feels right now, how mom got pretty darn pissed for the first time this year. i won't say it wasn't my fault at all, and trying to put myself in her shoes, i admit i'd be pretty worried if my own daughter didnt respond to texts till a tad later, and forgot to say she'd be back much later than she said she would

all i can think of that is: back home late + smelling smokey + sugar high = over-thinking on mom's part. well i mean, it was a CHURCH event for goodness' sake, and after that the four of us went to newton (explaining the smokey smell) for supper, ate chendol + bur bur cha-cha (sugar high)... i know what mom's thinking abt/of me, i know she doesn't really believe i was out with nat and her clsms - and i really don't like it. so all i can do right now is cross my fingers and hope she cools down soon ): till then, i don't think i'm allowed out for quite a while now

karlo once asked me how can i always be so cheery and happy, how much it takes before i can get really down or moody or anything. heh i'm def not always smiling, but well... i guess this is how much it takes D: just want this feeling of "-.-" and "i'd rather be in school now" to go away

still though, gotta be grateful that just maybe it's lightening up a bit since mom brought home a slice of my fav coffee bean cheesecake for post-dinner dessert. and well, last night BEFORE all the coming-home drama happened... that was awesome, truly truly had a great time. first time ever in a new creation church service. on top of that: a CNY celebratory service :) worship was great, and i absolutely LOVED the worship music and the play - being all written by their own members. saw pastor prince in person for the first time! :D

service... quite an eye-opener being in a Charismatic service for the first time, realizing everyone else in there could speak in tongues O.O i cant exactly formulate a solid opinion on it, but while i'm not exactly used to a so-called "non-conservative" Christian environment, i've nothing against it either - i think mostly because the love for God is certainly still there :) really would like to talk to someone abt this soon though! interesting...

and it was a great opportunity to get into the heart of worship and focus on God for that period of time once again, after a long time :) for all of that being in a church service and all, i'm just really glad nat asked me to go, actually!

before that was a trip to the Lab (failed attempt at collecting jet's and my Dec salaries), and national library w nat and ginny. it was really quite funny, nat sifting thru philo books, me tapping away while referring to books on weevils, GINNY CHARLES sitting there drifting off to sleep and lazily murmuring that she didnt want to do any TOK/EE as she'd initially intended

and today... learnt a thing or two abt God after merv found me thinking abt stuff on accident :/ met feli for lunch then JL+JR chanced upon us and lunch turned into a cracking convo abt the randomest nonsense LOL. nuh was owning seriously, it was just mark feli and i, but we found these two kids who wanted to play monopoly... AMAZING game seriously, one i'll remember for life

there was this really bright kid who was incredibly deft at buying properties and soon amassed seven castles (the largest property attainable) on the board, "if anyone ever asks you what the 7 wonders of the world are, show them ur picture!" (yes i took a photo of the board). how he kept going in cahoots w his friend (nicknamed "businessman") to cheat feli and i of $$, but also how he gave us cash "for free' sometimes :P

how his friend kept having to pay feli cos she bought a million properties and each time he'd sigh and feli said oh, silent exasperation. but one point he landed on her Jungle Book property for the 147128947th time and he went: THE DAMN BOOK!!! lol just cracked us up seriously. and also like i kept landing on the first kid's castle properties, all along the most expensive stretch of the board btw. so lost the game w a $5500 debt to the bank D: there was a point where i had "one dollar to your name... nobody can get as poor as you." - feli

that girl kept landing exactly in between the castles and the kid was DYING to see her land on his properties HAHAHA :) he looked so gleeful when she finally did! gosh... so yep, quite a memorable day and something i'll remember. it really did cheer me up a fair bit, and for now, remembering all of that and putting it here for memory's sake ;)

hmmm forgot to mention that i nearly lost my phone yest cos i dropped in the cab and didnt realize when we got off at newton :/ till 10 min after we got there and by then the cabbie was on his way to tampines! so we waited for him till about 12.40 and i'm now $20 extra poorer ): panicked like !@#$%~ i'm SO dead if i lost my phone seriously so blessed and thankful that we didnt hail a cab off the road cos then i wouldn't be able to trace him back

there's always something to thank Him for :') just gotta remember to put some sunshine into my face for the coming CNY celebrations - visitations, and reunion dinner tmrw. just wish lil matthieu and co were back home now instead of in new delhi? ): AH WELL!

2009-01-20T20:37:00.005+08:00

je ne peux pas dire que je ne suis pas déçu à la façon dont des choses avérées quand l'école a rouvert. après que tout par lesquels le semestre passé nous a mis, après le tout ce qui était sur le réparer au cours des vacances. je ne dirai pas que je n'avais pas peur n'importe quoi de pareil me produirais cependant. en dépit de celle, j'ai vraiment apprécié toutes ces fois s'échappant du laboratoire, refroidissant. amis ! telles étaient de grandes périodes, et je me rappellerai le. mais cette bonne chose s'est terminée, et maintenant je ne sais pas combien de temps les dommages faits prendront à la réparation - de beaucoup de manières ses plus profondément qu'avant. ironiquement en raison d'école, il n'y a rien que nous pouvons faire, ni I… IB nous maintenant tout occupés, peut-être cela est quelque chose être reconnaissants pour.

tellement oui, la vie est un cirque et nous sommes ses imbéciles.

i am deeply thankful my QT is on the rebound. although tonight i know what's been going wrong, because now i have questions for God. not about, Heavens, no! it's "for"... but feli, izzy, pet, kristin and karlo: thanks guys, for constantly watching out :)

2009-01-18T18:04:00.002+08:00

they say the eyes are the windows to your soul. that how you feel, the most significant emotion at that one point in time, can really openly and emphatically be reflected in those two (in our case) hazel eyes. so even if you say "no nothing happened, everything's good." but your eyes are dancing like crazy candlelight... well! :P was just thinking about it earlier, if there's a way to not show it like some people can. (not to say expressionless, but for some it's harder to tell) people've said before they could tell when i was happy, exhilarated, annoyed, worried, REALLY worried, sad, angry, cheeky, etc. malu brought it up again earlier and well it's kinda disturbing

maybe those peepers were saying something in school lol... or not. but anyhowdies, was pleasantly surprised and very very thankful in fact, when izzy paid a surprise IM last night, followed by a rather sobering call. i dont know yet (or if ever) how it worked, but i'd read her blog about her amazing walk w God, and really some parts just stuck in my head? :) esp how she gives one hour of her time daily to God no matter what happened.

and so she had a video... a series of them in fact, and shared one about passion w me. not passion of the Christ, but passion for the Christ. i think it really struck a bell, that pertinent reminder that i honestly haven't done a proper QT since nov 08, and not regularly (i.e. 7 out of 7, 4 weeks running) since sept 08 :/ seems so simple, just that few min a day at least w God but... what? there that's the truth which i've "tried to deny" for a while

beyond that, that other niggling feeling: knowing somehow (by some gut or female instinct or whatever) that until this walk w God goes right, everything in life could feel great, could feel special or something - but could never feel complete. for example in a hypothetical situation (crossing fingers here) getting really good grades for IB in Nov wouldn't be a blast at all if i were to remain the same as i am now. (or bringing resolutions to life's other matters). because it was a simple video, and offhand, one might just say "oh, right." but thing is it really did hit spot-on and so my new goal of 2009:

get right w God: putting Him above all else in my life (grades, friendships/relationships w other people, own wants/desires/needs, etc) simply because He's all i need to get through anything one and all of these, and He has the best plan. and like i told izzy late last night, something i realized - i could try running away in every which way, but the only direction i should be going in is into His arms :) like my favourite ever gospel song goes: into your hand, i commit again. ... You hold my world, in the palm of Your hand :D

dum dee dum. this evening these eyes are smiling :)

*P.S.: thankfully all that falling down on me bum yesterday while roller-blading didn't result in not being able to sit down, in the end. HAHAHA. it was quite an amazing "parade"

2009-01-15T23:34:00.004+08:00

amazing what an hour long talk can do to you. EE and bernarda alba are hot on my heels. or rather i'm hot on my heels for EE but... all i have to do is remember the all-famous: "for those of you who haven't started on EE yet, you've really gotta start getting your act together." and i get these LOOKS of disapproval D:

okay like its DEFINITELY time to start. AM. GETTING. SOMEWHERE. still, "Chock-latte without endorphins!" :P honestly... HAHA. destress destress! it's annoying but EE and BB and everything IB's been in this head of mine. numerous visits to rena, another one where i havent begun EE yet and she's gonna poker me! ah! D:

bleaarghhh anyw wrt to that stress-offload post, i realized something over the past couple days and the results are somewhat strange and foreign. again though IB owns all and most things are now a "whatever" :/ or a "deal with later". haven't talked to the BB girls properly in a few days now... except feli hurhur. imy loves!

dingaling interesting perceptions and stuff learnt from kenneth, had a serious talk after sch/math today abt BB, recent events, cohort cohesiveness/sense of togetherness, etc. asked him abt his Primers batch, and realized many many many things today D: most important of all is where we're going as a batch, and well, how great a note do we want to ROD from BB with? it's coming, and you can choose to stop feeling things or whatever, but you cant stop time. and time can REALLY kick ass

pity all that enlightenment did the weighing scale no good ):

okay new post-NY resolution: wake up early. i've been late for sch two days in a row not cool. first day was cos i'd 2 hours of sleep (4.30-6.3o) the night before, NO CAB AT ALL and just "heck-care"-d and got meself booked. today... i conked out on my study table last night and woke up this morning at 7++ so well... didnt bother coming till after 8plus and walked into econs still bleary-eyed. luke: "wahlao you look dead." LOL feli was giving me the Look :/

oh my. the clock just struck :)

happy birthday to joanne!

wow... now i've known the girl for seventeen years. it's 18 but minus the fact that i was born nearly a YEAR after her. yes, a YEAR. i'm surrounded by old(er) women seriously HAHA alena and jo! two darlings (: truly truly AWESOME

2009-01-14T00:03:00.005+08:00

i know this is a public blog but its also a diary of sorts. so if you're in a good mood, i'd really recommend elsewhere right now, before anything else.

SO.

there's that analogy: apple pie baking nicely in the oven over time. people smell it, it's like a lure and so they walk over in droves and decide for themselves "wow, yummy!" and dive right in for the kill. so the thing ends up kind of eaten away, crumbs or maybe none at all left behind. not to say that it's only crumbs now (good heavens!), but the knife has cut a clean edge to it anyway. .... and one'd wish it were back in the oven. its not impossible: there are days when you'd rather be invisible so nobody would notice anything, so they'd have nothing to conjure for fun of it and perhaps for once and for all, just "shut the moo up". it's like that game where people pass a message down the row, and the end person gets something so far different from the beginning and you're like WTFH. its so stupid really. and if i thought last year was ****, this year's something else altogether. lousy start to the new year indeed. punching bag please?! here's to wondering if "normal" is ever possible. stupid tok. but well, maintain that resolve to hold your head high and sail through school, through classes being okay, looking on the brighter side of life/keep thinking grass on your side is greener. and remember waking up each morning is about "yay", not "****" am vaguely aware of sounding like some spoilt whiny brat right now.

:) smile, you! and yeah man

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALENA

love you girl, and always will!

Jay/cee. ♥ is HAPPEE 18TH BEEDEH ALENA WAN WEN XUAN! ily =)) says: (12:04:01 AM)

so old, woman!

[alena.] - & grace has overwhelmed my brokenness; says: (12:04:07 AM)

yeah i realise too! sniff.

Jay/cee. ♥ is HAPPEE 18TH BEEDEH ALENA WAN WEN XUAN! ily =)) says: (12:04:13 AM)

nevermind

Jay/cee. ♥ is HAPPEE 18TH BEEDEH ALENA WAN WEN XUAN! ily =)) says: (12:04:18 AM)

you get to drink and drive

okay back to stupid written comm for o'connor :/ "if i don't get it by assembly tomorrow morning HANDWRITTEN, i'm marking you down" (i typed it and it was due today)

this is dem blardee pissing ): excuse the language, but peeved is the least word to use. at least there's dinner-dessert-date w alena and her church friends today/tmrw night to look fw to.

it's high time i turned back to QT again, it's like a discotheque strobe light right now. on-off on-off bangbangboomboom and i shan't live w a daily guilt of not having the daily bread okay joke not funny lol D:

2009-01-11T20:25:00.003+08:00

crossing my fingers for tomorrow, really don't wanna get sick. although might just fall dead on the spot from looking at everyone hahahah chris foo's ToK presentation on stage fright LOL D: but yeah okay there's always feli and karlo to hide behind.

OKAY ANYWAY KINDA KIDDING about that... "kinda" :/ just feeling slightly nauseous from the thought that my throat blanked out suddenly in the mid-afternoon. it can't be a side-effect from this morning can it? speaking of which, if IB allows me the time, i might be able to follow up w one of my 2009 resolutions! ...

GET UP EARLY TO JOG/RUN.

now, under usual circumstances: mon-fri sees me rushing arnd frantically gathering all my things in the morning, washing up quickly and dashing off to pick up amanda. sat finds me usually lazing around in bed until i tell myself i don't wanna be booked, then i get up... "rush around frantically...dashing off" to go for BB :P sun is the only day i have to run - PROVIDED i don't go for 0830 barker service. (even 1030 is a tight squeeze)

but yeah man i did it today! :D ran from home to botanics (did one loop around the park), then up and down half of dempsey village, wound off to holland, looped around near civil service college (buona vista) then back to holland to meet mom. went home at around 9.30 to a nice cold jug of milo (: mind you, i woke up at 630 and left at about 730.

so so happy and kinda accomplished right now. plus you get to think over stuff while you're at it, and once in a while, maybe allow a bit of ToK-EE-(double Bio) IAs to creep in stealthily :P

dum-dum-dum 6 am fall-in tmrw wth haha and worship prac at keson's place in about half an hour i better get ready and wait for feli to come! yayayayayay feli-and-me sleepover tonight; we'll prob try to do some work together then crash for the night...for the next morning :)

after watching australia yesterday i now think that aborigines are quite cool. they can stand on one leg for long periods of time (flamingo!), sing really nice melodies, throw spears really far and accurately, embrace really other-worldly beliefs that actually KIND OF make sense... maybe it's just a movie but ahwell!

2009-01-08T20:42:00.002+08:00

time flies, doesn't it. or time doesn't fly, but you're the one doing the flying around. anyhows, working on presentation for Primers' Council on Sat, and well. thought i'd look into my QT journal from last year, snoop around so it'd help w all this reflecting on a year gone past

so, other than the fact that i'm gonna be EXTRA careful on 10 jan sat even if its not a "friday the 13th" or anything... but u can well imagine i don't really wanna do a repeat "crash-into-lou'ee while going down a slope top-speed on a mini-bicycle, and wind up almost killing the guy" moment. neither do i want a scar on my left knee to match the sizeable one on my right knee, which came from flying off the bike (literally) and body-slamming the road :/

ANYWAYS, i have uncovered, CSCE COMM- PRIMERS COUNCIL 2008 :)

(wow.)

Aims for the year ahead (CE section)

1. Usual activities: Live! Praise, Weekly BS,

2. Collection of prayer requests to be emailed to Officers weekly (?!?!)

3. Church members as prayer members, inculcate into Potluck for parents and OBA (i have no idea about this one; what it means. "huh?")

4. BS functions as a constant spiritual food source: Strongly encouraged to split into distinct groups (something like Discipleship groups)

5. Transition from BB into FireAC and other Christian ministry events/activities

6. Maintain sense of decorum and SHINE FOR GOD! (:

Recommendations:

1. All Primers to attend BS (vital to unity) [added comment: HMMM.] :P

- Need to ensure attendance (!) and presence of worship leaders

- Y2s spiritually fed w/ Y5s running spirituality of LDC Camp [past event]

2. To promote gifts of each of the members

3. Christian related activities: MCYC, LDC, SGB, BB-Cares

4. Incorporate Y2s into community service, love for God

- Y5s to mentor Y2s, assist growth in Christ, to discipline and minister

5. Project I/C to improve efficiency; Worship I/C to be responsible for... worship [debatable positions now, judging by the size of CE Comm HAHAHA]

again i say, time flies; it seems only like yesterday we were gathered into that glass room in a nice solemn circle, listening to wesley chan's address. this year it's russell... and the next "chan" is who? wait till y5s come in officially, i guess :P everyone's getting older.

for that matter, happy birthday liza! JUMP HIGH :P HAHA

waking each day, with that sense of doom like a heavy cement block's sitting on your head. like you've got an exam everyday. its rather annoying, but i hope it's only the initial scare of being in Y6 (finally?) :/ doesn't mean i'm gonna slack too much, either, though. "too much", note :) imma good girl!

hopefully marissa and my application to switch out of math SL2 to the NORMAL SL3 which everyone else is in, will work. cos it really sucks to be stuck in there when everyone else is on their way home already ): blah.

2009-01-07T00:44:00.004+08:00

taking a little break off IB (its actually more of silly reflections, a report or two, articles and miscellaneous backlogs of IAs) to... spill :) all in all, very glad for the many students today who practically made the stage overflow like crazy. in particular for the 4 from BB (!) who were part of The Nine. and yep, the sweetest was definitely minkyeong and benedict chen :D absolutely wow-ed everyone, and now... (as heard from feli)

pinoy: the golden couple of ACS lah, i bet their kids will score 46 out of 45.

and then there was the funny guy in a loud pink/blue outfit that could possibly make "best dressed of ACS graduands" in tmrw's ST headlines :P absolutely gorgeous, HURHUR. in any case, today's results just completely added pressure to everyone. like after receiving our chi B results, our class just stayed in class during PE and BREAK to MUG. cheers to joppa, seriously wtp haha :)

my MSN personal nick now shouts: "social life, where art thou? (HA HA HA)" no guesses where the last part comes from, unless you're not from IB :P heheh its all this tide of wanting to do really well this year, in particular in 10 months time (ONLY!)... and then to enjoy euphoria, not regret, next year. which essentially means making a few sacrifices, albeit some i'm not sure i'm prepared to make :/ in any case my usual top distraction (MSN) is defunct haha i'm IGNORING it

we have a class bid to do well too! esp after realizing 6.14 of 2008 had like the lowest scores (39 points average!) across the level. but then quite a few of that class popped up on stage today, much to our delight, and some completely random (annoying to others, probably) clapping and cheering on our part. beu, weekee, manda, kristin, me... and pet amused herself braiding kristin's and my hair!

for good measure, i'm not sure exactly what's going on right now w that *sthg*. but well it definitely improved by leaps and bounds during the hols and i'm glad to say i'm acting less of an eejit in school now. much much much less. yeah mistakes have been made, but more imptly, lessons have been learnt. now, just biding time...

two reports down, one chem and bio IA to go; this is how i count my days and minutes now eeyerz ): ah well, study date w feli tmrw! worship prac on fri morning, that's something to look forward to. everyone's so cheerful and happy, and the songs are gorgeous. today was our first, and it was really great - all that atmosphere. plus had natalie w me, an added bonus :) love you, girl!

"mighty to save" and "with all i am" have been replaying on youtube for a long while now. my top favorite hillsong records... they never fail to brighten up an IB-nundated life D: morning cabs w amanda, afternoon going-home cabs w ginny. roflmao

its late, i can tell cos my thoughts (in this post) are scattered and randomized beyond belief! night :)

2009-01-03T17:46:00.002+08:00

well then, 3 days into the new year and a smile's still on this face :) so far so good, that is. so it all began w a countdown watching the brazilian dancers at clarke quay... a majority of whom i very strongly suspect were trannies! haha. and they did the samba and mambo so that was pretty fun to watch, and what w all the favorite tracks and whatnot! afterwards, a walk back in dead of night from CQ to orchard road took ages and accentuated by heels but ahwell it was worth it :D got back and watched house bunny (removed all brain cells) till the sun rose and shone! HEE

and all the while there was this huge anticipation for the coming of the new school year. so many things: beginning of the end, the first of the last year, reminiscence and nostalgia :) had a rockin' time at ophelia's playing guitar hero and rockband w all the fun songs (red hot chili peppers! :D) until it was way time to start getting back for sch prep. HAHA my coordination sucks to th core no wonder i don't play musical instruments seriously!! like drums was major hard and i kept forgetting th pedal! ): at least guitars were good, a HUGE improvement from last time HAHA w both bass and norm guitar. singing, on the other hand... GRIN

had a small bout of insomnia, and before you know it, a new school year. HAHA malu kept teasing abt who i'd see first of all in school bc she believes in all of *that* stuff and so kept going at it non-stop :P well yeah it felt kind of weird all the way up there on level 5 but we'll make do, its prob better in forcing me to stay in class and do work huh good girl :) although v high up!! feli and i have a theory that we'll drop 3 sizes aft this year from lack of eating! (already succeeded in 1 size HAHA)

only one thing perhaps was the uhhh application didnt exactly go too smoothly and lots of admin problems came up so things in *that sense* haven't changed. idk if its a good or bad thing but classes this year arent so spread apart so i guess it'll be fine :) i think...? kristin asked how i felt about it, and up till now, i can't say i really know for sure except give a 'fine/okay'. meredith-type answer teehee

parade today!! and live! praise (: in which after the first song feli and i realized our mike was OFF. AHWELL, it's us :P and i promised i would never get her into anything again without checking first what kind of event it would be HAHA i must say we both got a little alarmed to say the least today when we found out ALL that would be going on. and now an article for today's event is up on the HW list as well *pointed look at someone* HAHA :P

yay dinner at aunt sheila's tonight along w my fav four sisters (:

my ability to do chemistry HL is drop-dead gorgeous. emphasis on "drop-dead"

2008-12-31T01:32:00.004+08:00

because its almost time tick-tock, tick-tock

HAPPY NEW YEAR'S 2009!

in advance, that is. time: 1:34 AM 31 Dec

in these last hours, a certain senior gave me a good talk earlier; reminded me of many things... like what would be a wise thing to do at this point in IB. reminded me of my priorities and kicked me back towards God and all the stuff i should be doing and what not :/

i'm glad it ends this way; catching up w a few friends at least. lunch w manda at akashi jap (paragon outlet) today :D mmmm grape and peach ice cream there is highly recommended only that it's really annoyingly expensive. like only if u've a credit card on u or something, haha. met felicia for twilight! so now we have a plan, cos we love the music:

me: you know something, first day of school on friday... FELICIA!!! i have edward cullen!

felicia: HAHAHA yah i'll go *jump jump* JAYNEEEE!!! i have HSM 3!

*both of us do some uber dramatic throw-soundtracks-across-school thing*

note, soundtracks. although i've cut out all these movie/magazine funky things and stuck them all over my diary for next year :) well, not many but some. its called can't-do-EE-do-something-else, and so my time wasted away... but well. at least i'm prepped somewhat. all holidays and i still haven't touched my year-end papers to see what i did wrong D:

OHWELL.

sigh. there's that line that stuck in my head: "your mood swings are kind of giving me whiplash." couldn't be more right, right now. it was our last conversation i'm guessing, before the year ends and the new one starts, so its kinda a bummer yeah but auld lang syne and i'll choose to ignore...

i have a bad memory of being outside mount elizabeth today. this arab guy, he just took up the passageway, went like HI and flashed a huge grin :/ i was kinda freaked for a mo', just plugged into my iPod and walked on. afterwards mom said maybe he was looking for the "last jigsaw piece in his harem of 72 virgins" D: that was funny though, set me laughing. i love how mom's always full of quirky stuff/comments; need to write them down somewhere

on a funny note:

was talking to jasmine about how she could do certain features on her journalism blog... like she explores stuff all for the fairer sex, and comments on them. herself :) and so -

jay/cee ♥ contours of Christmas' hope never fade says: (2:14:52 AM)

could u do some whippy-hair or seasonal eyeshadow cover or something

jay/cee ♥ contours of Christmas' hope never fade says: (2:14:57 AM)

or like NECESSITY OF BIKINI WAXES

walking the same line between joy and sorrow says: (2:15:18 AM)

lolll

walking the same line between joy and sorrow says: (2:15:21 AM)

omg, I scared

walking the same line between joy and sorrow says: (2:15:28 AM)

plus shy

walking the same line between joy and sorrow says: (2:15:33 AM)

especially bikini waxes

jay/cee ♥ contours of Christmas' hope never fade says: (2:15:34 AM)

oh yeah wait

walking the same line between joy and sorrow says: (2:15:36 AM)

RITE OF PASSING

jay/cee ♥ contours of Christmas' hope never fade says: (2:15:41 AM)

investigative journalism. shit i forgot

HAHAHA i died laughing :)

all in all, an eventful year yes. some old friends i've drifted away from; some i've kept by my side (alena, yingming, the pinks, lynette). then of the new: those closest, we'll stick together till the end (someone accused me of being idealistic, but i do believe that some friendships really do last and certainly i believe it for, at least, our "xoxo-BB-girls" lot... among certain others). work-wise, i've a plan that's half-baked but then the morning is arriving and i can do some real thinking then :)

so yes, am quite ready to welcome no. nine with wide open arms and a huge toothy grin (: now to end the year in style (i.e. dig out some fun frolicking friends and do something to always, always remember)...

love to one and all,

xoxo Jc ♥

2008-12-30T00:12:00.002+08:00

so the countdown plan this year, looks to be more spanking than previous years... or at least more full of buzz and all-that-jazz. i'm not sure if it's gonna be the most fulfilling; i certainly doubt it'll be at all the most impactful (spiritually)... but it's gonna be pretty fun at least.

instead of something at my place; probably gonna hit some party somewhere w ophelia and try to drag some of each of our own friends along :D looking at some possible places now, thinking and wondering... i think i need to grab an ID off someone. but a public promise that i won't break my alcohol abstinence vow teehee. (some sigh in exasperation HAHA AMANDA. some sigh in relief, you know who you are :P) and i'm gonna behave myself, as always, too. nobody needs worry...

after that? have some people over i suppose; ophelia's party cum housewarming after. basically no work done in these next 2 days, other than the fact i'll try to squash some chem and EE in tmrw MAYBE BABY D: like tim told me there's a chem thingy next week and dude, i realized yesterday i missed 50% for chem by a very SMALL margin ): it's not a ****** good sign i met venthan in school today!!!

needs personal assistant *amanda! inside joke haha* whilst window shopping around at shaw today:

*phone starts ringing - yingming. i look down*

me: HIIIIII! :D

ym: HI.

me: HIIII *wondering why she's calling one day early*

ym: STOP SAYING HI. where are you??

me: HUH.

ym: i'm in school, just done. are you gonna be ready soon?

me: HUH. i'm in town.

ym: WHAT. my dear u know what day it is today

me: er... 28th?

ym: *exasperation in her voice* 29TH!!! WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MEET.

me: SH*T.

omg i completely lost track of time. and kept blabbering apologies like an eejit for ages after that but anyway OKAY 31 DEC 2 PM jayne will cease to exist if i forget again which i can swear up down left right i won't! :D okay i know tmrw's TWILIGHT again!!!! :D :D i love that show to bits haha edward cullen and kristen stewart have amazing chemistry; bit biased towards ed though, obviously. being like any other screamy little twilight female fan ;) although the only ones who like carlisle as well (hot daddy) so far are like, me and pet -.-

QT is so dead i really want to get it up before new year's... but judging by tmrw's activities, that seems to be quite a squeeze. haven't even had time to think abt the year, what i wanna do differently next year, HOW MUCH WE'VE ALL CHANGED, role in ministry next year (if ever...) even :/ but all's for the better, am happy and contented for now.

too tired to do much else; just came back from a long long day D: pretty effective; squeezed in some world lit for which i'm just that BIT proud of. considering... haha. but brain kept stalling, so. went to bibi baba to get a new sweater! :) it's a prettier navy blue than my present faded furry one. but still no new uniform, or for chloe either! ugh.

okay like the assistant in there gave me a REALLY weird look when i said "hi just to double check, do you have ACS independent's FEMALE uniform." he was just like "independent...female...huh?" O.O could sense he wanted to ask if either 1. i meant acjc OR 2. are you some tranny.

all in all, a pretty glorious day. now i'd turn in early before i fall dead and really look like a zombie tmrw. 5 people told me i looked dead today D: too many 4 am nights since my birthday doing goodness-knows-what!! most recently, eBooks and chick lit, surfing for no reason, etc. I NEED TO DO EE AND WL SOMEONE KICK ME. AND CHEM ):

rant rant! but yes, today's the second last day of new year already, and i think we all plan to enjoy it dont we :) oh yes, i think my little visit to Admin Office this morning went successfully. now its a mix of swell-and-ebbing tides of regret, eager anticipation and... peace? looking fw to doing better next year. i HOPE

what a long post.

2008-12-26T23:52:00.002+08:00

just made the most complicated decision i've been brought to make, in this entire year. not that it was any complication to begin with, from the outsider's point of view... but for me, on a deep and personal level, pretty much so.

i know i'll probably be happy when the consequences come through - good consequences :) but for now, yep feeling sort of empty yet... something else, can't place it.

today was emancipation from two months of lab; i've had great takeaways in research i suppose, and new friendships made. the closest being to dear old bhuvan (: thank you dear for being such a great girlfr to talk to, whether shiz/nonsense/"dirty" or serious, heart-to-heart chats. it seems so fast since 3 nov, but well anyhows... it's a milestone in life? AND! hwachong's uniform fits me like a glove, its amazing. rj's doesn't look too bad either! haha :P

clearly 2008 has been a "learn much, grow much" year. i'm pretty different from the "me" at the start of this year - by this, ( infinite ) much

my QT has died for ages now; feeling pretty crappy about it on an hour-by-hour basis. need to do something about it :/

2008-12-24T01:55:00.003+08:00

first post as a seventeen year old! not to say that this doesn't bode well for the year ahead, but am indecisive as ever. great, another huge decision upon this little usually-not-thinking (HAHA) head of mine but what do you know? unable to decide, can't put a finger on sthg without reverting and thinking WHAT IF's and WHAT-SIT's D:

no wonder people use dice to make their decisions, really. if i can't decide by the time Christmas is over, i'm gonna flip a sterling pound coin. queen elizabeth's head = YES; ... her tail = NO. AHAHAHAHAH. meanwhiles, will just continually seek wisdom and keep up my QT with God :) its about time i got back to it.

i think i run away from how i feel a lot. like trying to hide from it or denying it but somehow its just not working well for me right now, to keep up with this hide-and-seek game w myself? so yes... kinda fed up and just being me me real me for now :) nothing to hide, all game and good, bright and sunny! all the way man...

just in case, for whoever passes by, am currently using these online devotionals, until i get the new issues of Everyday With Jesus :) so here:

THOUGHTS ABOUT GOD

Girlfriends in God (Crosswalk)

HarvestDaily (Crosswalk)

in the past days, there's been some nostalgia, some missing people back home, lots of mad reckless fun on board... including crashing a performance *cough cough* what do you get when u put 8 growing fun-loving madcap girls together HEEHEE D: and then there was a whirlwind of spontaneity (to BB HQ) and gossip, more fun and laughter, a bit of frustration here and there, then TWILIGHT :D ed cullen OMG MY NEW DESKTOP HAHAH. no i do not have a thing for vampires but still!!

the world needs more gingerbread cookies with almond eyes, sugar buttons, pepperings of sugar and spice (cinnamon)... and a wide cheesy smile! :)

but well.

MERRY CHRISTMAS PEOPLE!

i shall hopefully be not overly-festive in about 20 hours time :)

and hopefully not bursting another jean button (okay i didn't, but still) after this marvelous cruise of mine that fed everyone every minute every second! i feel like a pig D:

2008-12-17T23:32:00.003+08:00

another year gone past - another age older :/ perhaps not exactly for the wiser, but certainly for the better... well, sixteen going on seventeen? one more day, and the "sweet" is lost ): and so i do remember telling someone (i think it was jasmine teo), that sixteen would promise to be one "helluva of a year", and boy wasn't i right

one thing's for sure though - change. not the height (sadly), not ~~so much~~ the weighing scale. no i haven't gone from goody little innocent girl-next-door (HAHAH i think alena would object strongly but WTV! :D) to frumpy grumpy "!#@&^*!&*^" ball of emo-angst. up down up down, some all the way up, then zoomzoomzoom abysmally abyssal... upupup again. like some kind of ECG chart/cardiogram i swear :/

that is, a heart of one who's eaten too many Big Macs. XD

but anyway, i've come to realise a lot of things as well; all those more subtle changes. let's start w the materialist: up till maybe june/july i'd be all for fashion updates, mags, etc. but this phase comes and goes... yeah i'm all for all the dress-up and having pick-through-wardrobe fun, window-shopping and all. but i'm just not the 15-year-old who fusses over "snakeskin" anymore :) guess that's a good thing, and well there's so much more to life than fabric and makeup (again, im not denouncing it... its just a change in priorities) :P

and then there's all the, how'd you say, little life stuff. we live in the city, yeah... and that's pretty much how it's always been. but give me the chance and i'd zip off to the country (the closest chance being university, but i'd really love to stay here too. too much to leave behind) in other things, i'm not hot for all the prim and proper stuff: fine dining, extreme etiquette, and all. frankly, i'd much rather grab a few good tasty heartland bites, have a good street-lit walk after; do something random like explore kent ridge park or something :)

not to forget that recent bout of cab abstinence week HAHAH D: that entire stretch of walking just that bit more, of saving just that bit of $$$ was only part of it... i think more so there's something more enticing about having the world pass you by a little more slowly on the bus; something more enthralling about standing in the mrt, iPod hooked on and stoning at the little baby girl clambering up and down her seat restlessly... all that, rather than getting maybe killed by all those frightening speeding cabbies :/ or weird drivers

like how i was waiting for mom at barker the other day and suddenly this car broke down in the middle of the road; guy behind noticed too late. i looked up from reading zhuoey's present (SCREWTAPE) and "BANG!" O.O sent a warning msg to mom for fun... she turns left into barker road and suddenly "BANG!" third car pile-up. nasty!!

eck digress. but yeah everything just feels so different this year from last; certainly helped by the many different kinds of lessons learnt. you could even say i've learnt to be less spoilt brat this year (ok gotta admit it at times). mostly cos of the more recent months, an intangible educator reminding me to be less self-seeking, be more considerate of others, how they felt and all :)

likewise in QT, Pastor Noel Goh's words stick in my head, from that 830 service long long ago... yeah its my gmail signature now, because its taught me alot and how to go about life on a day-by-day basis. this year's many events have taught me to rely more on God; even then only tonight in fact i re-established that strong trust in Him, faith that He'll put all right as it is more-or-less now...

for a long time to come: Galatians 2:20 "The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." made Him a bunch of promises, the topmost one about prioritising and really hope i'll carry that promise through even into next year. but there'll also be besties to remind me, remind each other, i suppose :)

so yup as the new year opens, as the new seventeen hops around (along with 12 issues of the mag by the same name :P)... am anticipating much more fun, bright sunny smiles and importantly, the keeping of friends (from this year and before) to grow up and grow old with :D guess some things DON'T change then: sunny good ol' saggitarian optimism and general outlook on life. not a bad thing

already looking forward to the new year 2009, and not just what's on in about 22 more hours... so hmm, HI FELICIA TAN SHU XIAN, i'm not scared of all this anymore :D merry Christmas and a happy upcoming new year, all!

p.s. this past week has just about possibly been one of the most memorable, greatest weeks ever (: and i'm very much thankful for it

hurhur D:

2008-12-12T19:18:00.002+08:00

AHHHH. to say otherworldly would be an understatement of the year...

SIGH. no this has nothing to do w my upcoming jaunter off to... :P

12 days into december, 7 days to go,

13 days to better

19 days to whoa!

2008-12-11T20:49:00.003+08:00

running through gmail account; everything's been kept since day 1, mostly :) so it first began on 22 dec 2005 (kimberly was 14! :D) and yeah of course we all sounded different. typed different. but some things/loves don't change clearly: that was the age where alena and i had this sudden urge to sign off every single email with something related to FOOD :D

so this is what the emails looked like:

*runs away in embarrassment first*

squeeshed peaches, jayne.

to which she replied with:

- rotten pears and mouldy bananas.

alena!

and another...

purple apples and polka-dotted watermelons,

- alena.

my personal favorite:

peanut butter and kaya,

-alena.

ps, thatll taste horrible, wont it.

so now i remember all these beautiful little things:

1. once had an english tuition teacher nicknamed CANDY chew

2. a previous english teacher forced me to read harry potter 2

3. my sec 2-4 bio teacher pretended to be someone else for months before finally saying that she was my teacher. by then we'd made pretty okay friends (: lynette introduced us. slyly

*note: I KNEW SHE WAS FEMALE AND... yah okay talk to strangers, fine fine*

4. used to do puppydogeyes at every other person i think lol

5. lame jokes like: "it vanished into thin air!" "... oh so air diets! wow!" :P

6. Two Macha's were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like hell.

So the other asked, "Why are you crying?"
The first one replied, "I came here for blood test"
Second one asked, "So? Are you afraid ? "
First one replied, " No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger"
Hearing this the second one started crying.
The first one was astonished and asked other, "Why are you crying?"
The other replied, "I have come for my urine test."

7. Ramasamy died and went to heaven.

When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that new rules were in effect due to the advances in education on earth. In order to gain admittance a prospective heavenly soul must answer two questions:

1. Name two days of the week that begin with "T"
2. How many seconds are in a year?

Ramasamy thought for a few minutes and answered...
1. The two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today andTomorrow.
2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
Saint Peter said, "OK, I'll buy the Today and Tomorrow answer, even though it's not the answer I expected. But how did you get 12 seconds in a year?"
Ramasamy replied, "Well, January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, etc..."
Saint Peter lets him in without another word.

8. alena and i used to fashion our own house designs on something called drawahouse.com :) and came up with rather interesting lodgings of all shapes, colours and sizes.

9. hot sweaty days in the top of suntec packing things for the standard chartered marathon (: but in good company of alena (again!) haha. made life funky gossipy fun. blue, green fun

SIGHZX INNOCENT DAYS LOST TO IB.

on another note, phatz is finally flying home from DUKE hahaha love you and we miss you dear, see you soon :D

gee sometimes i wonder what would have happened in this life of mine if i'd really gone over to UK at the end of sec 3? and would probably be still there. AND would have continued pre-university there, probably killing myself over A-levels right now instead of IB :/ wouldn't be enjoying the tropical rains, like we're doing now. social life? a RATHER different group of friends, probably. its hard to say how green the grass is on that side, but. i think i love everyone here, so.

Pastor Noel Goh: "We will always want more, both for ourselves and for others. But God gives us what we need." God has a plan for everyone :)

2008-12-09T02:26:00.003+08:00

really bored, thoroughly sick of thinking about language and senses in ToK terms (without philosophy's interference, life would be so much simpler). and so, THANKS TO IZZY'S ELEMENTARY-BANANA (thanks dear! :D) i now have something to amuse myself with:

(done with iTunes on shuffle)

How does the world see you?

The Blessing (Mars Lasar)

- :D

Will I have a happy life?

Mamma Mia (ABBA)

- OH MY MOTHER, quite literally :P

What do my friends really think of me?

Heartbreaker (will.i.am)

- O.O"

What do people secretly think of me?

We Cry (The Script)

How can I be happy?

Glamorous (Fergie)

- hmm. flipflop+tank+sand+waves days make me happy too :)

What should I do with my life?

Down Once More, Down this Murderer (Andrew Lloyd Webber)

- ooh vindictive. anyway, i plead innocent :)

Will I ever have children?

Careless Love (Madeleine Peyreux)

- so a certain kind of 'careless love' = accident kids HAHAH

What is some good advice for me?

Figure A and B [Means you and me] (Hellogoodbye)

How will I be remembered?

Unfaithful (Rihanna)

- YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME D:

What is my signature dancing song?

Flashing Lights (Kanye West feat. Dwele)

- disco mania; saturday night fever?

What does everyone think my current theme song is?

Save the best for last (Vanessa Williams)

What song will play at my funeral?

I'm Not Missing You (Stacie Orrico)

- wut horrible friendzx

What type of men/women do you like?

Another Realm (Kevin Kern)

What does next year have in store for you?

In Pace (Sarah Brightman)

- needed, if i am to survive IB Year Seex

What does your love life look like next year?

Sweet Sacrifice (Evanescence)

- UH OH. doesn't sound good either way. work/heart

What do you say when life gets hard?

Battleships (Travis)

- "an eye for an eye", but we are taught not to fight back violently?

What do you think when you get up in the morning?

Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds (Bone and the Edge)

- are a girl's best friend (:

Song that reminds you of your first kiss?

Frohliche Weihnacht (Sarah Brightman, Helmut Lotti, Placido Domingo)

- just to clarify, never before. but... "Merry Christmas"?!?!

Your favorite saying?

I'll Be Home for Christmas (Diane Schuur)

- AWWWW. yeah i'll be this year :)

Most missed memory?

All I ask of You (Andrew Lloyd Webber)

What song describes your best friend?

Stupid Girl (Pink)

- HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I'M SORRY BFF!

What song describes your ex?

Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Green Day)

- HURHUR D: can see why he became an ex ... what ex?

What song describes yourself?

The Quidditch World Cup (Patrick Doyle)

- imma witch on a broomstick chasing four tiny balls around

Where you will be in 10 years:

Little Drummer Boy (Vienna Boys' Choir)

- more like a son. (and i'd be 27!!!)

Your love life right now?

Sugar, We're Going Down (Fall Out Boy)

- down where? at least its sweet not spicy. XD

What is your state of mind at the moment?

Voca me (Libera)

- "Call me": Latin. Not at 3AM, nope no thanks :)

What do your parents think of you?

Too Little Too Late (JoJo)

- ): tis a sign. stop procrastinating ):

What do you think about often?

Microphone Fiend (Earth, Wind & Fire)

What is your life story?

Let It Go (Brit & Alex; Step Up 2)

What will you dance to at your wedding?

When I Grow Up (Pussycat Dolls)

- lyrics: "be careful what you wish for, cos you just might get it" :P

What is your biggest fear?

Strawberry Fields Forever (Jim Sturgess & Joe Anderson)

What is your biggest secret?

Playing With the Big Boys (Steve Martin feat. Mark Short)

- O.O

What is the theme of your life?

I Slept With Someone in Fall out Boy and all I got was this stupid song written about me (Fall Out Boy)

- .......................................................

hahahahhahaha okay this quiz is so scandalous but its good (albeit FALSE, i must insist :D) fun when you're bored! :) back to work in a few hours and i really should go to sleep hmm? tok can wait; there's much holiday left to go

9 more days to seventeen! RARWARGH

2008-12-08T03:06:00.003+08:00

need to sleep

earlier than

three am and six minutes

ugh.

but yes bio rhythms are completely upside down from

well, too many late nights and

a really late late late one yesterday. heck,

it wasnt even night anymore :P

BUT we missed sunrise again ):

now i know, at 5.30AM don't step out

it feels like london winter

tomorrow (rather, today) is hari raya... aidilfitri?

for once, no lab on a weekday. at ALL!!!

= stay at home, chillax, noon plans! :D

time to squeeze some EE and ToK in somewhere

esp since guiltwash this evening when

me mentor woke me up from a nice nap

GRR. just to talk abt EE and i just kept going

"huh huh oh yes yes okay... HUH HUH..." for 5 minutes

yesterday was holy communion:

pet and bong were my guestsofhonor :D but we

DIED. in there because we were all knocked out

pastor d gwee's leaving ):

everyone's leaving: bong and sunfish to harvard in boston

and new york city!!!!! in about 1+ days time ):

victoria secret, madison, metropolitan, central park

harvard, hallowed halls, history (h-alliteration) :D

WAHHHHH i wanna stuff myself in manda's luggage

then again, you have at least a half-dozen going to HK

this giving-loving-sharing season: count is currently at say,

8 plus 1 plus 1 = 10 and still counting... O.O

whats up with everyone? ): lucky lucky haha.

jay/cee ♥ all i want for Christmas is! says: (1:58:24 AM)

my BFF is a kinky panda

i'm going to get killed for that :P

but what's not to love.

(note to self: gerroff msn)

something i read, way funny... but true!

Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of crap in return.

and for kicks, TQ loves! for everything ((:

2008-12-04T01:40:00.003+08:00

destressing from lousy "tea, okay?" essay outlines:

1. thinking about various snacks i could possibly attack at 1.40 AM

2. blasting some crazy rock music that doesn't help them dying brain cells

3. trying to organize tomorrow's stuff-that-i-need (WTH)

4. playing online games

the last one entails something called hungry spiders where i'm just randomly whacking those creepy-crawlies with a magnifying glass. yes its retarded t th max but whatever haha its destressing and it kind of works... until the spiders reach the cake and the graphics show it munching its so grosse ewwww ):

today was. well i'm sad that shanshan's gone off again for the next 9 days so till then, its just me the only XX chromosome in the lab D: which = quiet days because i'm not exactly up for chatting abt sunshine w XY's who are like my age x 3 AHAHAH! yah really how do you talk life to a japanese supervisor or something?! really wish shanshan was around; we'd be discussing everything hot, naughty and nice :P sigh

but there're more of these episodes when i'm not doing anything during lab? so make the most out of it by reading bernarda alba (neurotic women, seriously!!!) or uhhh nic alchin (teeokay) which is... self-explanatory :D anyway more reason to get off early

!nk meeting @ 1plus today! decided to go to bio labs and what a blessing! in disguise seriously :) found out rena had the stuff i needed (sitophilus oryzae, bio HL ppl! :D) so yup i've a bag of said S.O.'s crawling around in the kitchen now; really grosse!!! but like ginny weirded me out by squishing one flat (weevil juice! O.O) between her nails. through the bag, of course!

haha spent 2 hours in lab today, talking to ginny and rena! :) fun fun i never knew, and rena fed us this thing called dodo! its an indian dessert thingum ("isn't dodo a dead, very extinct bird?" - me :P) which was quite nice. "checked out facilities", set a date w EE mentor in about 6 hours time!

wait that's not a good thing ):

yesterday was the awesomest everrrr hahaha after lab! :) went to pet's, met bong at cityhall with pet and linny and boy did we celebrate her birthday!! got the staff to sing and dance a jiggly dance complete w noisemakers (pet slid under the table in all embarrassment :P), ordered a candyfloss cake for her, MADE HER TAKE OUT HER BDAY PRESENT IN PUBLIC HAHAHAHAHAHAH (she hates us, but loves us) :D chilling and camwhoring at the riverside, went back and 00:00 hours:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PETRINA LIAM.

okay its one day late here but well. love you darling, and yep thank God too for a friend like you :) knowing you might probably see this; YEST NIGHT WAS BEST EVER and i'm glad it was for you too! BUT REMEMBER THIS. just cos you're 16 days older than me doesn't mean you get to have first meal pickings all the time *cough* okay!! :D AHH ILY MAXXX xx

I WANT PLAY SPIDER GAME AGAIN okay nevermind go sleep D:

two more days, just two more. can't wait! :) been so short, but yet so long!

2008-12-01T00:09:00.005+08:00

first day, first few minutes of the last month of the year

which has always been my favorite as far as i can remember;

no not because of the nineteenth (as much as i love it HAHA :D)

but because it means -

Christmas: tis a season to be jolly

Thanksgiving: remembering all that we've been blessed with

New Year's Eve: time you spend thinking abt the past year

11PM on 31.12: start sighing as Auld Lang Syne plays

countdown: being w friends and family, altogether now :D

0101 new year: fresh beginnings, new starts. sugar, spice, everything nice :P

and ya la ok birthday - one year older

(one year closer to white hair, actual occupation;

many other things) :D

FROG = Forever Remember Our God

but yes i do foresee a tad lengthy post towards end of this month

recalling all the happy sad bitter sweet moments of this year 08

looking fw to a brand new oh-nine and

all the (useless) annual goal setting (but grit ur teeth for Y6 people)

DAMN SENTIMENTAL HAHA :D

stuff like on SGB opening ceremony; that night

intending to shop but chilling outside taka chanel

chatting to bong abt everything; anything (: felt really happy

never sat out and watched orchard move past for hours

(its always us doing the hours' of running around madly

from store to store)

Q: what do you get when u cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac?

A: A guy who stays up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

HAHAHAHAHAHAH :D

and right now i really really wish singapore

had a christmas market like Prague :)